This Day's Post

So, I am sitting here at work, waiting for a phone call, at which I will spring into action and work very hard. But since I can't really stray very far away from the phone I thought I would post now, so that I don't cut it so close to the wire like I did last night. Lol. Today is April fools day - but I haven't been fooled (at least not that I know of) nor have I fooled anyone. I never really have. Except one year when I built up this story to my Mom a few days before that I met this guy and we were going on a date, then on April 1st I sent her an email that started of innocently enough saying we were getting married, but then it went on to say I was going to quit school and support him because he was in a band that was really awesome, and I didn't really need school anyway and that we were moving to some far away country or something like that (I feel like I tried to make it more and more ridiculous the entire way through so that she would figure out it was a joke by the end and not freak out too much). Anyway, I think my bro ruined it accidentally by saying "did you get fooled by that email from Mandi?" or something like that not realizing that she hadn't read it yet. Anyway, it would have been funny had she believed it. I might still have it in my sent mail somewhere ... I should go look for that.

In other news ... oh wait, there is no other news. My life is too boring. Blech. I haven't taken much time editing. I just read. I really want to go on vacation somewhere but my inner self tells me I should make a few other payments before I buy a plane ticket somewhere. Plus, the main place I want to go (home to visit my family) I don't want to go right now because it is still freezing there. Brr. I just want to get away and do things I don't normally do in a place I am not normally at with people I don't normally see. I guess I could do that here, but not as much because I get in a rut. Rut, rut, rut!

I wish they would just call me already!

Day 2

So, today is almost over and I still haven't blogged ...yet. Yeah, I know you thought I was going to forget already, but I didn't. Nice try. Maybe next time.

Not much exciting has happened today. I went to work, came home a little early, watched Buffy (last 3 eps of season 2 - so good) and knitted, went to GoGo (a mongolian grill), watched some Arrested Development. Now it is about bedtime. Just need to post on the old blog and listen to a song that a friend recommended and then that is about it.

I am a bit tired so it is good that I am about to go to bed. I have this problem, where no matter how good my intentions are, I can't seem to go to bed at a decent time. I was planning to go to bed early-ish today but now it is 11:30 at night and here I am typing away. Stupid stupid girl. Oh well. I guess I will learn sometime. Or else I will fall asleep right after work someday and have one of those evenings where I come home and sleep from then until the next morning. Either way I guess the problem will be taken care of. Haha.

I have been thinking about my future a lot lately (shocking isn't it? Oh wait, no it's not, that is all I ever think/talk about anymore!) and I was looking at possible schools today. Grad schools, optometry schools, etc. Part of the problem is that I didn't really try my hardest in my undergrad and so I don't really think that I will be getting into any post-secondary educational programs that I want. I know, I know, it can't hurt to apply ... but dude ... what if I fail?

Okay, I will stop. And go to bed. I think ....

Posting is Fun

Well, I know it has been a long time since I posted last, but I have been busy darnit! Doing what? You ask. Well, knitting and watching Buffy on DVD, that's what. So suck it up. And so this morning I was checking all my blogs and I was sad because hardly any of my people updated since I last checked. Just because I check obsessively doesn't mean I shouldn't be rewarded. Anyway, again I realized I was being hypocritical so I decided that this month (April obviously, since March is almost over) I am going to try to post every day. Because, let's face it [insert title here].

Lol. I am a dork. I can't promise they will be good posts, but they will be posts nonetheless. I mean, this is about the total of this post, but it better than nothing right?

My New Favorite Website ...

... ravelry.com

I know that it sucks that you have to sign in, but you just have to sign up to be sent an invitation and they will send it to you in about a week. They have tons of awesome patterns and stuff for knitting. Woot!

Also, writersdigest.com.

Yay for the internet!

Stupid Klutzy Unlucky Day

Well, this is going to be short and sweet - I hope (and when I say sweet I mean it will be sweet for you - it wasn't for me).

To start the story of my awesome day I will need to mention that a week ago, after my friend's wedding reception that I went to, I was hanging out with my friends and one of my friends swooshed his nerf sword near me and I was still wearing a dress from the reception . Anyway ... my skirt flew up and I kinda flashed my friends.

Fast forward to today. I had to take my car in to get serviced and I was later than I meant to. Then we went to go out to lunch while we were waiting for my car to be finished and we went into this one restaurant and the staff seemed to have no idea what was going on - so we left and tried to find this other place. We called free 411 to see if there was one of what we wanted in the area - but that stupid phone number sucks. Anyway, after driving around for like an hour we finally found a place to eat (not the one we were looking for).

Then we went to another wedding reception. Afterward we went to dinner at this place - I was still wearing my skirt and these cute boots with heels. Anyway, the floor was kinda slippery and my heels are kinda spiky and I almost fell on the floor. Then when we were leaving my skirt fell right off. Seriously, it fell right down around my knees and my butt was exposed to the entire restaurant. A restaurant that has big glass windows all the way around it. At least one guy was looking right at me and laughed his head off. Luckily I was wearing spanx at the time, so my butt wasn't totally hanging out - but they were nude coloured so it looked like my butt. Gah!!

I then changed and we had a good laugh. Then we had to go to Fred Meyer's to look for knitting needles. As we were walking through the place I tried to pick up a set of needles and the whole thing it was hanging on fell. Then as we were leaving there was a candle display and I dropped one of those on the ground and it broke all over the place (yeah, it was one of those ones that was in a glass jar).

Anyway, I need to go to bed and hopefully sleep off my clumsiness.

Trip Time

Basically, I really want to go somewhere or do something that is not be here. My friend and I want to go to Kelly Clarkson on June 11th in Utah - but it is way cheaper to buy 4 tickets than to just buy 2, so we want to find someone else to go with us. Also, I have to check that I can get the time off since my boss will be in Pitt/DC at the time of the concert. I guess I could always find a diff concert to go to but Utah is always nice since I have a bunch a friends and family there so I could kill two birds with one stone so to speak. But I really want to get away. I was thinking about visiting my friend in Texas for a while there, but the other problem is that I am broke and cheap. Gah. Any suggestions on fun things to do/ places to go that aren't too spendy?

In other news, I have been trying to do some editing on my NaNo story, but I keep getting all sidetracked by books that I am reading. First it was the Harry Potter series, which I finished, but then I made the mistake of going to Powell's twice in as many days and buying a total of 5 books (they were almost all sale books and really cheap so I didn't have to spend a lot of money) but now I have all those books calling my name and so I have to try hard to actually edit instead of read. I already finished one of the books though - it is called Interworld by Neil Gaiman and Micheal Reaves. It was really good (and an easy read which is always nice too) and I would recommend it if anyone is looking for something good to read. Maybe I need to find a writing contest with a deadline so that I have a goal date to be done something by to keep me motivated. That doesn't always work ... but it can't hurt to look. We will see.

Anyway, that is all for now - I have to go do some work and then I am taking my car in for an oil change and some other routine maintenance crap. Woo. Lucky me. More money that I get to spend on fun stuff like that. Gah. I have a love hate relationship with money.

The Weekend

So, Friday night I went to a friend's wedding reception. It was fun - small and quick and fun. I like weddings, because I love seeing my friends who get married when they are so happy (and she did look beautiful and happy) but I hate them because of the inadequacy I feel and how I feel like I will never have one. Seriously. Whatever.

After that we went to hang out with this friend of ours and we stayed over at his place until late just chatting and hanging out and even playing the Wii a bit.

Then on Saturday I had to go to work for a bit in the morning, then I came back home and watched a couple shows on Hulu (love that website!) I just want to insert here how much I really like the show 'Dollhouse'. I gave it a try because it is Joss Whedon - who created some of my favorite shows ever (Firefly, Buffy, Angel) - but I keep watching it because it is interesting. You should watch it if you get a chance. I also watched the new Office. Hilarious.

Then we went to visit some friends who live in Tillamook area. It was great. I love those guys. They are really cool and down to earth and just really good at making you feel comfortable and accepted, no matter what.

Now we are back and I am just waiting to get in the shower so I can get ready for church.

Overall - good weekend. :D

Contact

So, I need to wear corrective lenses. I have worn glasses for the last about six to either months because I was too busy (and lazy) to go get new contacts at the eye doctor. But I finally went! Yay! I remember now why I love having contacts. They don't fall off my face like my stupid glasses, I can wear any pair of sunglasses I feel like, and mostly, I just feel like I look better. Not that my glasses were terrible, they suited me and looked fine, but I like not having them so much more. Although, it has been so long that the first day whenever I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror or something I thought something was missing. Even now I still try to push up my glasses once in a while so they don't fall off my face. And apparently the glasses hid my eyes a little since I have had about three people so far ask me if the contacts I got were colored because my eyes look so blue.

In other news, nothing much is going on. I finished that ridiculously boring course, and now I can x-ray your animals. I keep saying small animals, but heck, if you brought me a horse I could x-ray that too. I have never actually used an x-ray machine and I don't really have access to one, but darn it, I am certified to do it! It was a bit ridiculous that I had to take the course since I am just using a DEXA scanner, which is not really the same as x-rays and way less complicated (you position the animal and then click 'go') so I didn't really need to sit there for the full 20 hours. Oh well, I did what I had to and now it is over with. Whew.

I am thinking about getting a new phone, but I am on a family plan with my friend. I am torn now about whether or not I want to get my own account or just continue as I have been. The family plan has benefits - such as if I ever move out of the country I could probably not pay the cancellation fee, but just pay the $10 a month for the rest of the time and call it good. But then on my own would be good because I would get the new every two service they have, and also I would be able to use my employer discount that I can only use if I am the main person on the account. I am still thinking about it anyway. Give me any thoughts or suggestions about which phone you would get if it were you and put in your opinion about the whole own account thing!

Scolded

So, I have been scolded by my friend about how often I update my blog - which isn't very often, I know (although, as far as I can tell, said friend doesn't update her blog very often either, so she is just being a hypocrite lol). Anyway, she is right though - I haven't been updating. I have actually opened to this new post page every day for the last week and then not been able to think of anything blog-worthy and so I just navigated away, sans new post. I guess I just think that my blog should be somewhat interesting so that my readers (all four of them) aren't too bored with it. Although, they might be more bored with no post than a boring new post, I am not really sure. Either way ... I am kinda getting off track here from what I was saying. My point is that she is right, and I know it, so I am going to make an effort to post more - boring post be damned!

So, I have to go to this x-ray class for the next three days instead of work and I am not really looking forward to it. It will be good to have the certification but it will not be fun to sit through the class (I don't think anyway, I could be surprised). And to top it all off, it is all the way out in Clackamas - which is like an hour from here. And it is at 8 in the morning, so I have to fight rush hour traffic. This is really going to suck. Esp since I live about 7 minutes from my job, so I when I have to fight rush hour traffic all it does is make my trip 15 minutes instead of 7, so not really a big deal.

And the worst part is that I can't even like read a book or anything fun like that while I am traveling. I guess I could get a book on cd, but I have issues with those unless you are taking a really long drive, 'cause I don't like to have to try to find a good place to stop and then sometimes if I can't hear it over car noises, and then if I don't pay attention for a bit I get confused. Anyway, in my opinion it isn't a long enough drive for a book on cd. Good think I like driving.

Also, I did end up finishing the ending of my novel. So now I have a completed first draft. It isn't long, but as I was reading through it I noticed lots of places I need to add things in and change things around and all that fun stuff, so I have quite the editing journey ahead of me, but at least I have the entire thing finished. That is quite the accomplishment I think. The last part that I wrote ended up being about 4000 words ... but I was getting kinda tired at the end there so I may need to add some stuff to it once I flesh out other parts and make it more comprehensible. So, after I get time to work on editing (I think that will be after I finish reading Harry Potter - I am on book 5) I will be looking for a few good editors. I already have a few people in mind ... but I will probably want anyone who is willing to read it. So yeah ... if you like fantasy let me know. :)

Figured It Out

So, I never really finished the story that I wrote for NaNo. I finished the required 50,000 words to become a winner of the contest, but I never ended the story that I wrote. And then I abandoned it for a while and couldn't even remember what happened. So, I just re-read the whole thing and I have good news - I figured it out. I know exactly how it is going to have to end and the way to get there. And I don't think that it is too obvious (I hate books that are super predictable) but I guess I will have to wait to find that one out. Anyway, I am super excited to get off work today and go home and work on it! Woot. I will let you know how it goes once I am done. And how long the finished product is.

Friday the Thirteenth

So, I have always considered the number 13 my lucky number. I am not sure why - I think it is because when I was in elementary school our intramural teams all had to make these huge posters. We were the Black Stallions and we won that year (I think). Anyway, the poster was pretty nice - it had a picture of a Black Stallion on it that we painted (I am pretty sure JR did the most of it - how strange we were on the same team eh?) and then all the names of the people on the team. And it was huge. To win the poster at the end of the year we all had to pick a number between 1 and 100 and whoever was the closest to whatever someone drew out of a hat got the poster. I picked 13 and won. Go me.

So, now when days like this roll around - Friday the 13th - I always think it is going to be my lucky day. It never really is of course. Not that I noticed. But it is never a really BAD day. It is usually just a day. But still, it makes me happy to think it is the 13th and a Friday. And I actually get tomorrow off! Woot. I have to work on Sunday (which sucks) but I get Sat off so that is nice. Maybe I will do something other than just sleep and read my book. We will see though. I kinda like reading and sleeping.

Push Me Pull Me

So, my life has been a bit crazy lately. Who's isn't, right?

On that note, we were chatting at work the other day about why people make decisions in their lives and my boss said something that I really liked (she was quoting it from someone who said something to her about 12 years ago - I just don't know his name or I would give him credit - but chances are he was quoting someone too so I don't feel too bad). Anyway, she said that people have two things that drive them to make decisions - a push and a pull. If you don't have both elements, you will never make a decision. You have to have something pushing you away from your current situation and something else pulling you to your next situation. For example, if you are going to move you need a reason to leave and a reason to go where you are going.

I think that is my major problem - I have the push but I don't feel like I have a pull. I want to leave my job, but until I get a job somewhere else I can't leave. Mind you, I know I should be helping out a bit by, I don't know, actually applying for other jobs (right Mom?) but that doesn't change the fact that there is no pull. So I am on a quest for a pull right now.

Sunday Secrets

What a provocative title, eh? Too bad this isn't going to pan out into anything interesting. I just check the Post Secret website all the time and that is what he titles his new posts.

Anyway, Costa night turned out really good. I only made 2 pounds of the pork, so there weren't a lot of leftovers, so I think next time I am going to make more. Mmmm.

-Break-

And now it is no longer Sunday. See how lazy I am?

As for more info the make this blog not so dull. I had a weird dream a few nights ago. I dreamt that I had a job interview at Merck (where my friend who left my lab went to work), except it was a huge group interview. Seriously, there were like 50 people there! And most of them were these young recent college grads. At the beginning we were all intermingling with the current staff and everyone kept thinking I was part of the staff. Anyway, then we sat down and this woman was giving us instructions and everyone else was talking during the whole thing and fooling around. I felt like I was in a high school english class or something. It was nuts. We were then supposed to go to lunch with the current employees and I asked my friends if I could get a ride with him. That was when I woke up. I am not sure if that means that I am afraid that I am not good enough and I am going to get beat out by some recent college grad or if it means that I think I deserve at job at Merck instead of the rcgs. Whatever. It was interesting anyway. My friend said it was pretty high tech over there and so my mind's adaptation of that was the most interesting part.

This dream reminded me of my 'scary' dream from the holidays. I really want to make that into a good story. I might have to do a bit of editing since the 'big bad wolf' thing isn't really that scary, but I am going to work on it to see if I can make something at least a little tense out of it. Wish me luck.

I have also been reading my story from NaNoWriMo over again so that I can do some editing and let me tell you, it needs a lot of work. And I am only on page 30 or so. Gah. There is a lot more I need to add and change around and stuff like that. It needs work. But I have been distracted from working on it because I started reading the Harry Potter series again. It is so good. I laugh out loud frequently and my roommate thinks I am nuts. She said I was the only person she knew who actually laughed out loud when reading books. But my grandpa does it when he reads comics so I guess it is hereditary. Whatever.

Anyway, I guess I should go. The dishes are calling my name. And the last like ten pages of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Yeah, yeah, I know. Why would I only leave ten pages? I was trying really hard to finish it before FHE, but to no avail. I had to get ready. We were barely on time as it was, if I had finished we def would have been late. And I don't like being late!

Wednesday ... I think ...

So, basically I am not sure what day of the week it is ever. Welcome to my life.

So, today at work I was not working as hard as I should have been but instead I was looking up things that I could potentially do with my life. And so as I was doing this I looked up Grad Schools and I found the greatest website. You could search for schools based on different areas of Neuroscience (like Behavioural or Imaging) and then they would bring up all the ones that have those programs. Then you can click on the school and it would tell you program info, admissions info, cost, financial help information - all sorts of good things. It was a great website. I wish I had known about it before. I am not sure I want to go to Grad School but that is a great resource. I have been looking up other types of schooling too - Optometry school and PA school and stuff and they have websites like that but they just list the schools and you have to go to the school site on your own and figure out the stuff you want to know. Anyway, I was impressed with the site. Mandi is happy now.

Well, mostly. I still don't know what I want to do and I have to apply and then once I decide I have to take the test that I need to and then I have to decide what to do from there. So, I really don't have any more decision made than I did before but I have a new resource at my fingertips.

In other news, the local Costa Vida closed a few weeks ago, or months or something like that. Anyway, it was traumatizing. I find myself craving it every day and my friends keep saying things like "I could really go for some Costa right now!" which makes me want it more. So last night I decided to look up some recipes. I put some pork in the marinade last night, then tossed it in the crock pot today and we are going to make some rice as well and have burritos. I hope it turns out good. I am excited! I will post again later telling you all about it!

Cheater Cheater Pumpkin Eater

So, I talked to my mom on the phone today and she told me that my last post was boring, and a long time ago so I have decided to post again. Something better I hope. I was thinking I was going to cheat though and post another excerpt of my novel since I still have nothing interesting to write ... but I have been away from it for so long I am not sure what a good part to post is. Obviously if I am going to do that I am going to have to re-read the thing first. And then I am going to have to do massive editing because I know it is going to suck (which is why I haven't read it yet - I am afraid of the suckiness). Anyway, I plan to do that soon since I want to finish it and then do a lot of editing.

Moving on. The reason that I don't have much to post is that all I do is work. Work work work. I had to do a thing last night that I had to be at work until 1am. Ugh. Then I had to be at work at the usual time this morning. It was fun. It reminded me of my 4am custodial days - barely sleeping, then going to work, then having a nap, then going to work, then barely sleeping, then going to work. Boring. Anyway, I did manage to finish the book I was reading - but now I have to read the next one in the series. It is a trilogy called Sabriel, Lirael, and Abhorsen by Garth Nix. It is really good so far. I just finished the second one. I really like his writing style most of all - it keeps you interested without getting too plot driven and yet there is enough action to not be bored. I think I just repeated myself. Oh well, I hope you get it.

Anyway, so that is all I have been up to lately - reading and working. And sleeping which I love! Love love love! Maybe I will do something interesting this weekend. I know that Sat is supposed to be our Ward talent show which should be interesting. I only know of one talent that someone is doing that I saw on the sign up sheet - this girl is reading and excerpt of the novel that she is writing. And she is a weird girl. We will see how it goes.

Anyway, that is enough for now. I hope this wasn't as boring as the last post (I don't think it was) and I will be posting a cheater post once I start re-reading. You got lucky this time!

Well then ...

So, I am being a bad girl today - I am not going to go to choir practice. I should but I really don't feel like it. So I am not. Tra la la.

Yesterday was a good day. We went shooting out past Banks at this little place that I couldn't get back to if I wanted to. We had a lot of guns and ammo and we shot targets such as milk jugs and pop cans and we also shot clay pigeons. My friend Adam had this 7MM rifle that was my favorite thing to shoot of all the guns we had. It was powerful and had a pretty good kickback on it but it was fun. I think the main thing I liked was the feel of it and the fact that it had a really good scope on it.

I am not really in the mood to write a long post right now. I just don't know what to say. I have a lot of things that I am thinking about, just nothing worth writing. I have been trying to do better at asserting myself - and I am doing okay. Not stellar. But okay. The thing is that I still am worried about offending people. Which is okay I guess. I will still work on it.

Well, that is all for now (I told you that I didn't want to write a long post). Bye for now. Sorry this was such a boring post.

The Power of Resolve

So, I am happy to report that I accomplished my goal last year - I flossed more than I did the year before. Of course, that wasn't hard, since I never really flossed the year before that so I only had to floss a few times before it was accomplished. But then I went to the dentist just about a month ago and when I got my cleaning done the hygienist mentioned I should floss more (do they ever NOT have to mention that to anyone?) so I did. The last few weeks of December I flossed quite a bit actually.

This year I don't have any goals like that. I am of the opinion that New Year's resolutions are kinda silly. If there is something I didn't do before now, why do I think that suddenly I am going to do it now? It isn't like I got some magical burst of resolve that made me want to change my life. I think sometimes people do have that happen - but it is almost never at New Years. Like, usually when someone wants to lose weight it is because they realize how big they looked at so-and-so's wedding, or they had some sort of health scare. Same with quitting smoking and most of the other really common New Year's resolutions people have.

But I did have a moment like that recently (it was on New Years actually). You see, upon meeting me most people think I am outgoing and fun (at least I think they do) and a word that you would probably not use to describe me is shy. And I don't think that is the word I would use either, but I am definitely very low on self-confidence. And I hate that about myself. I hate that I feel like I can't say what I want to or do what I want because of the way I will look to others. It isn't just physical self-consciousness either - I hold my tongue a lot because I don't want others to judge me. I have tried hard not to develop an opinion because then I can honestly say "I don't care, whatever you want." And to an extent these things are okay. It is good to be a pleaser sometimes - it makes me happy to see those I love happy. But sometimes I shouldn't have to hold my tongue because I am afraid of being judged. If you don't like me because I told that stupid joke or because I am not really very eloquent or because (heaven forbid) I have an opinion that is different than yours, then screw you. At least that is the attitude I would like to develop somewhat.

The main problem that comes with being a pleaser is that no one really gets to know the real me, because I don't let it out. I play the role that I think you want me to play. If you need someone to be funny with, then I will do that; if you need someone to talk to, I will listen; if you need someone to talk to you, I can do that too (boy can I!) - but it is never about what I need. My roommate tells me that it is okay to let out my emotions more and I think she is right. Why is it that I can't have emotions? I can't let myself show that you hurt me, because then I might be vulnerable.

So, after all that rambling I guess the real goal here is this: I need to be myself. Fear be damned. Consequences be damned. And I am not just doing this because of New Years, that is just a serendipitous coincidence. Courage, help me out here because I am going to need you.

Upping the Numbers

So, it is my last day here in Canada and I am doing something so fulfilling - I am upping my count. Yes, that's right, I am watching more movies. I really like watching movies and that is about all there is to do here in Small Town Alberta anyway. Right now I am watching The Happening. I know that some people have said it was crappy, but as a neuro-scientist I still wanted to watch it to see how they justified everything.

Things are going well other than that. I have been having a good time here and as much as I am ready to go home I am surprised because it came really fast. Like, really fast. Time always does this weird stand-still/fly-by thing whenever I am home. I think that makes sense so I am not going to explain it. If you are confused then just chalk it up to me being weird and ignore it.

I still have to pack. I went to Lethbridge to visit a friend from High School today, and then Jess and I went to a movie (7 Pounds - it was super good, and no, I did not cry). After we left the movie I was thinking about the things I had to do tomorrow and it hit me that I had to catch a flight tomorrow! I haven't even started thinking about packing yet. This is going to take some work. But I don't want to do it. I wish it would pack itself. Blech.

Anyway, I guess I should sign off for now. I am trying to watch this movie and it is getting really weird (what a shocker - it is a Shyamalan movie) and I kinda want to pay attention so I can complain about how crappy it was later. My next update will be from Oregon! Woo!

Christmas Post

So, today is Christmas day and it has been a good one. I mean it. It has been a really good Christmas. I stayed up way too late last night chatting with Dallas and Jessie and then I still had to wrap presents. So basically I slept barely at all before JR woke me up to open presents after Mom got home from work. It was okay though because I just went right back to bed after the presents. The worst part about all of it is that Mom has been sick since about a week before I even got here and I think she gave it to me. Luckily I didn't seem to get as sick as she is - at least I haven't yet. I just got all achey and I had a headache and I was dizzy and stuff like that. It was weird. It came on really fast too. It was Christmas Eve and I felt fine all morning but then I had a nap on the couch and when I woke up from that I felt like crap. And I told JR and Jessie I would babysit Johnny for a while but I felt so crappy that I mostly just sat there and stared at him. Poor kid. He wanted to play but I couldn't really move. Sorry Johnny. He is super cute though. I love that little boy. :D

Anyway, I am going to sign off - I think I will give my roomie a call. I hope that the airports are all cleared out by the time that I go to leave or else there are going to be some problems. :(

164

I stole this from a girl on facebook - it was too sad to post there so I decided to put it here instead. It is still sad.

SUPPOSEDLY if you've seen over 85 films, you have no life. Mark the ones you've seen. There are 239 films on this list. Copy this list, go to your own facebook account, paste this as a note. Then, put x's next to the films you've seen, add them up, change the header adding your number, and click post at the bottom. Have fun.

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest
( ) Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
(x) Starsky and Hutch
(x) Neverending Story
(x) Blazing Saddles
(x) Airplane
Total: 9

(x) The Princess Bride
(x) Anchorman
(x) Napoleon Dynamite
(x) Labyrinth
(x) Saw
( ) Saw II
( ) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
(x) Anger Management
(x) 50 First Dates
(x) The Princess Diaries
(x) The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
Total so far: 18

(x) Scream
(x) Scream 2
(x) Scream 3
(x) Scary Movie
(x) Scary Movie 3
( ) Scary Movie 4
(x) American Pie
(x) American Pie 2
(x) American Wedding
( ) American Pie Band Camp
Total so far: 26

(x) Harry Potter 1
(x) Harry Potter 2
(x) Harry Potter 3
(x) Harry Potter 4
( ) Resident Evil 1
( ) Resident Evil 2
(x) The Wedding Singer
(x) Little Black Book
(x) The Village
(x) Lilo & Stitch
Total so far: 34

(x) Finding Nemo
( ) Finding Neverland
(x) Signs
(x) The Grinch
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre
(x) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
( ) White Chicks
(x) Butterfly Effect
(x) 13 Going on 30
(x) I, Robot
(x) Robots
Total so far: 43

(x) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
( ) Universal Soldier
(x) Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(x) Along Came Polly
(x) Deep Impact
( ) KingPin
(x) Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
(x) Meet the Fockers
( ) Eight Crazy Nights
(x) Joe Dirt
(x) KING KONG
Total so far: 52

(x) A Cinderella Story
(x) The Terminal
(x) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
( ) Passport to Paris
(x) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumber & Dumberer
(x) Final Destination
(x) Final Destination 2
( ) Final Destination 3
(x) Halloween
(x) The Ring
( ) The Ring 2
( ) Surviving x-MAS
(x) Flubber
Total so far: 61


(x) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(x) Practical Magic
(x) Chicago
( ) Ghost Ship
( ) From Hell
( ) Hellboy
(x) Secret Window
(x) I Am Sam
(x) The Whole Nine Yards
( ) The Whole Ten Yards
Total so far: 67

(x) The Day After Tomorrow
( ) Child's Play
( ) Seed of Chucky
( ) Bride of Chucky
(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
(x) Just Married
(x) Gothika
(x) Nightmare on Elm Street
(x) Sixteen Candles
(x) Remember the Titans
( ) Coach Carter
(x) The Grudge
( ) The Grudge 2
(x) The Mask
( ) Son Of The Mask
Total so far: 76

(x) Bad Boys
(x) Bad Boys 2
(x) Joy Ride
( ) Lucky Number Slevin
(x) Ocean's Eleven
( ) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Bourne Identity
(x) Bourne Supremecy
( ) Lone Star
(x) Bedazzled
(x) Predator I
(x) Predator II
(x) The Fog
(x) Ice Age
(x) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
(x) Curious George
Total so far: 89

(x) Independence Day
( ) Cujo
(x) A Bronx Tale
( ) Darkness Falls
( ) Christine
(x) ET
( ) Children of the Corn
(x) My Bosses Daughter
(x) Maid in Manhattan
(x) War of the Worlds
(x) Rush Hour
(x) Rush Hour 2
Total so far: 97

( ) Best Bet
(x) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(x) She's All That
(x) Calendar Girls
( ) Sideways
(x) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
(x) Ever After
(x) Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
( ) Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
(x) The Terminator 2
(x) The Terminator 3
Total so far: 107

(x) x-Men
(x) x-2
(x) x-3
(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
(x) Sky High
( ) Jeepers Creepers
( ) Jeepers Creepers 2
( ) Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
(x) Reign of Fire
(x) The Skulls
(x) Cruel Intentions
(x) Cruel Intentions 2
(x) The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
Total so far: 122

(x) Swimfan
( ) Miracle on 34th street
(x) Old School
(x) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
(x) Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
( ) Ice Castles
(x) Boogeyman
(x) The 40-year-old Virgin
Total so far: 129

(x) Lord of the Rings Fellowship of the Ring
(x) Lord of the Rings The Two Towers
(x) Lord of the Rings Return Of the King
(x) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
(x) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
(x) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Total so far: 135

(x) Baseketball
(x) Hostel
( ) Waiting for Guffman
( ) House of 1000 Corpses
( ) Devils Rejects
(x) Elf
( ) Highlander
(x) Mothman Prophecies
(x) American History x
( ) Three
Total so Far: 140

( ) The Jacket
( ) Kung Fu Hustle
( ) Shaolin Soccer
(x) Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic
(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
(x) Shaun Of the Dead
( ) Willard
Total so far: 145

( ) High Tension
( ) Club Dread
(x) Hulk
(x) Dawn Of the Dead
(x) Hook
(x) Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(x) 28 days later
( ) Orgazmo
( ) Phantasm
(x) Waterworld
Total so far: 151

(x) Kill Bill vol 1
(x) Kill Bill vol 2
(x) Mortal Kombat
( ) Wolf Creek
( ) Kingdom of Heaven
( ) the Hills Have Eyes
( ) I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
( ) Re-Animator
(x) Army of Darkness
Total so far: 155

(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedi
( ) Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
( ) Ewoks The Battle For Endor
Total so far: 161

(x) The Matrix
(x) The Matrix Reloaded
(x) The Matrix Revolutions
( ) Animatrix
( ) Evil Dead
( ) Evil Dead 2
( ) Team America: World Police
( ) Red Dragon
( ) Silence of the Lambs
( ) Hannibal
Grand Total: 164

Okay so, if 85 is you have no life, then I REALLY have no life. I guess my defense is that I grew up in a small town with nothing to do. And I like movies - that is why I was originally a film major. Hate me if you will. The end.

Lucky Me

So, basically, I am one lucky girl. I was supposed to leave Portland for Canada (through San Fran) yesterday but it was snowing a lot. Like, A LOT! So, I went to the airport - we were planning to get there early anyway, but then my flight was delayed so I was even earlier. My flight that was supposed to leave at 4 ended up leaving at 5:15 or 5:30. We were one of the last flights to leave the Portland airport before it closed for the night until 10am the next day (at least that is what they told us over the overhead pager). Then we got to San Fran and I had about 20 minutes before my next flight took off. So then we boarded and I got to Calgary just fine. Around midnight. There were no problems in Customs or anything (not that there should have been, but I always get nervous about it). Anyway, now I am here and I am lucky I was able to make it. Now I am just sitting around being bored/boring. For 10 days. Lucky me.

Cold

So it is still snowing on and off here in Oregon. I guess this is good - it will prepare me for the coldness to come when I get home. Mom said it is freezing there too. Moreso than here. Oh well. I guess this means that I will appreciate summer that much more, eh?

As for things other than that, I am a happy girl. I worked a half a day of work yesterday (Thurs) and now I am off until the new year. Thank goodness. I love time off. I haven't had it in so long that I had forgotten how nice it is. And I get to see my family - I am way pumped about that. Mostly my nephew. Forget the rest of my family, I really just want to see him. He is almost a year old now! He changes more than anyone else in my family right now so that is why I want to see him most (no offense Mom)

My flight leaves at 4 in the afternoon tomorrow and then doesn't land until almost midnight in Calgary. It is kinda weird. I have to go to San Fran first too which sucks since that means that I will have a teaser of semi-nice weather before going to the arctic tundra up north (haha)

Well, that is about all I have to say right now. I am in the middle of trying to get all my laundry and stuff done so that I can have stuff to pack. So I am off. To pack. (actually I will probably not pack until the very last minute - that's just how I roll). Au revior! My next post will be from Canada (I hope!)

So Klutzy

Oh man. All I have to say is I deserve to have scars all over me. I am so klutzy. Today at work I was trimming these hard plastic things with a razorblade - which I have done thousands of times, and I slipped and cut myself. I did a pretty good job too. I got a pic or two but the camera was too dead to upload the pics - they will come though. Anyway, I didn't go to the urgent care or anything like that (but my roommate thinks I should have) because I hate it. I hate going in and having to explain what I did and how I could be sure that it never happens again and blah blah blah. I am just a klutz, okay you people over at workers comp? Isn't that enough for you? Apparently not. So that is why I don't go to get stitches. And it will be fine. A bit of a jagged scar, but not bad. I don't think. I am surprised I don't have more scars all over though. This explains some of the unknown scars on my body though. I m must have blocked the memory of getting them because they are from such stupid things! Gah!

Everything is Cancelled!

So, I guess I need to start off this post by mentioning that I live in Oregon. Here our weather consists of a lot of rain, some sunshine and occasionally snow that will melt as soon as it hits the ground (so not really snow at all). So, this morning our Ward choir was supposed to sing in two Ward's: our own and then a neighboring one (their Bishop used to be our councilor) but since it snowed all of two inches everything was canceled. It was nice since we were going to have to go to the other Ward super early, but it is sad since now we won't be able to sing. And I won't be here next week, and neither will a lot of people I am guessing, so I think that we probably won't be able to sing at all. I know I won't. Sad. Stupid Oregon!

Anyway, so now we are sitting around our house just doing nothing. We are going to have dinner later with a bunch of people (if they can make it here that is!) but yeah - I haven't really done much today other than sleep in and watch movies.

Well, I am off to do more nothing. I might actually take the time to shower. Woo. Go me. Over and out.

Huge 8 Ball

Okay, so I knitted this toque last night (yeah, that's right, I said toque - deal with it) and it is huge. Like, massive. Too big for anyone to ever wear. Well, that is not exactly true - but you know how when you put on a toque it is supposed to be snug and you kinda have to stretch it to put it on? Well, this one is nothing like that. This is loose. I think if I was wearing it and I bent over it would fall off. And I did an 8 ball pattern on it (I will post pics eventually maybe) and I didn't leave enough slack on the yarn and so the 8 is all bunchy and messed up. Anyway, I am going to try again and make it smaller (maybe I will actually figure out gauge this time!) and see if it works out. It would have been cute if it wasn't for those mess ups though. Wish me luck.

Anyway, I am off to the dentist to get some fillings replaced and a cleaning. I know it makes me sound sick, but I am super excited. Seriously. I haven't been able to chew on the left side of my mouth for months now and it will be nice to fix that. Yay for the dentist!

So ...

Well, today was a long day at work. What's new, right? It seems like lately everyday is a long day at work only to look forward to another long day at work. Things keep piling up and I don't feel like I am getting anything accomplished (even though I actually am) and it is just frustrating. Oh well, I guess that is how a lot of people's jobs are.

Mostly, the only reason I am even updating this right now is that I just got home from work and there is a knitting project I want to work on (something of my own creation, I will let you know later how it turns out) and so I decided to check knitty.com to see if there are any patterns to use as a base pattern that I can change to my liking (that is the way I knit a lot of things actually). The problem is that knitty is taking forever to load, which is really annoying, and I should go shower but I want to see these patterns first so now I am stuck sitting at my computer watching the little loading circle thing spin. So annoying.

I am really tired. I stayed up way too late last night. And I didn't even do any of the things on my list that I need to do. And there are many things on that list, believe me! I just am so good at procrastinating that I end up doing a whole lot of nothing. I am hoping that after I shower I will feel more awake for a little while at least so I can finish my experiment and then go to bed nice and early (like I keep saying I am going to do and then I don't).

Well, my thing finally finished loading, so I am off to shower and knit and sleep (in that order hopefully). Wish me luck!

Procrastination Station

Well, here I am, t minus 2 hours and counting until my final in my A&P class and I am procrastinating studying. Don't freak out too much mom, I have studied a bit, I am just procrastination studying anymore. So I thought I would check me email and my facebook and my blog again (see previous post) and there was nothing good, so what do I do next? I write a blog entry.

Things are going okay here in Mandi-land. My friend Mark bought Rock Band and so we have been having fun playing the drums and singing the last couple of days (we still have fun playing the guitars, but we did that anyway). I wish I was doing that instead of taking a test tonight - but oh well. I can later since this is the last class. Now I am trying to sell the darn books from the class and all I can say is - go half.com! Sell my blasted book for me!

I am feeling pretty broke right now anyway, which is sucky when you are trying to figure out Christmas presents but there are no dolla dolla bills anywhere. Blech. Oh well I guess, I will just have to make do. I have been trying to find a good stuffed monkey for my nephew since he was born and today I was in Kohl's and I saw the perfect one for only $5. It is a stuffed Curious George monkey - but it is the right size and cuddly, so I think I will go back and get it when I get paid. Yes, I am that broke that I can't even afford a $5 monkey. Shut up.

Friday night is going to be a Christmas party at the house of one of the guys in the ward and it should be way fun. There is going to be a live band, and then karaoke to follow, and there will be all sorts of games and food and activities. It should be awe-some! (yes I sang that as I typed). I am looking forward to it. And I am getting my stupid tooth fixed the day before that so I will be able to actually eat with both sides of my mouth at the party. That is even better.

Anyway, I guess I better get back to studying (happy now Mom?) but I will update again later. :D

Australia

So, last night my friends and I went to see Australia. We went based a little bit on a whim - we wanted to do something but I was feeling kinda lazy and so I didn't want to go bowling like they did. Anyway, we watched the preview and my one friend was a bit annoyed because Hugh Jackman was so scruffy in it - but then there was one shining moment where he had a shaved face, so she said it was okay and we went. It was way good. Hugh has some very nice glamour shots in it! Oh yeah! But dang it was long. There were about three times when I thought it was ending and then - surprise - there is another scene! I liked it though.

In other news - last night was the Ward Christmas party. It was fun. I always love free food! Woot! Can't complain about that. And it was really good food too - salad, veggies, baked potatoes, ham, rolls and dessert. And Martinelli's. :D Tonight I am volunteering to serve dinner at another Ward's Christmas dinner. I think they are going to feed us too, which will be nice.

Today the only thing I did - other than sleep - is get my cv ready. I am so ready for another job because my boss is a bit hard to deal with sometimes. Also, I just feel like for all the work I do I get paid beans. And I know that we didn't get this one grant funded so there is not much of a chance I am going to get a raise. And let's face it, times are tough. Financially I mean. So I wouldn't complain about more money.

Well, I am off to serve, I will update again later. I plan to do so more often (although I sucked at keeping those plans before - lol)

Posting Woes

Okay, so lately I have become obsessed with checking everything - email, blogs,facebook, ebay, etc - about every five minutes or so. It is like I think that I am going to get some awesome email that will change my life and if I don't read it as soon as it is posted or sent then I will never be able to read it and the life changing thing will not happen. How silly is that? I think it is because I am looking for a change but I am not sure where I am hoping it will come from. Maybe I am hoping that I will find out what to do with my life through an email.

Anyway, I was so annoyed that no one (except Lex) had updated their blogs lately and then I realized I hadn't either, and I didn't want to be a hypocrite so I thought I better blog. And I am going to try to do it more consistently so that when other people don't update often I don't feel to hypocritical. LOL.

So here I am.

I just finished my A&P final and I have decided that I am not going to take it next semester. I am really going to focus on getting a different job before next summer and I don't want to have to work that new job when I get it around a class. Also, it was hard. :(

I think I am going to work on finishing my novel now. I know, you thought it was already finished - but it was only finished in terms of the contest. Which means I wrote 50,000 words. It doesn't mean that the story is concluded. I will work on that since I know that Barlow is reading it and if I don't give him a conclusion before it is done he might be a bit confused. Haha. Also, then I am going to work on editing and stuff during the Christmas break. I have been meaning to enter this contest for a million years now and I haven't so I might try to get something ready for that too - we will see. The limit for that is 17,000 so I either have to cut my NaNo novel waaaaay down or write something else. But I do have something else in the works, so we will see.

Well, I am off to work on finishing that now. I will post tomorrow - probably late though cause work is going to su-uck!

I've Been Making Changes...

So, as you have probably noticed by now (unless this is your first time reading my blog) I have changed my layout. I even changed the blog title! Even though I have to say that the description is a lie - there isn't a whole new me, it just sounded good. I am ready for change though, that is for sure. Not that I am unhappy - I don't want anyone to walk away from reading this thinking that I am unhappy - but I still want some change to occur. I want a new job. I want to go to new places. I want to read new books. I want to write new books. I want to do all the things I always wanted to do but never got around to. I want to stop being as lazy about getting on top of things as I have been. I want to know what to do with my future and follow that course - not just sit around humming and ha-ing like I usually do.

Now that you know what I want, you also have a pretty clear list of the things that aren't going to change. I am going to try for a new job, but I probably won't get one anytime soon (stupid economy). I can't afford to go to new places. I might actually be able to read new books. I can't write a new book, I need to finish writing and editing my old books. I won't stop being lazy about getting to stuff because a lot of time it isn't laziness so much as lack of energy, lack of time and an abundance of fear. And I am so indecisive I have no idea what to do with my future.

But I am going to try to figure all these things out. And I figured the best way to start was to change my layout on my blog that maybe ten people read (ps, Hi Mom!)

I did it!

I did it, I did it, I did it, yay! (yes I was singing that to the tune from Dora the Explorer as I typed it ... you got a problem with that?)

Gah!

I actually like my MC more now after writing about her for so long. And I have been trying to do one final push to finish by tomorrow and I just had a realization about what has to happen that in all likeliness is going to kill her off. I am so sad I almost want to stop writing! I don't want to kill her but I don't know how I can save her and not have the story end up really stupid. Grr. The only thing keeping me writing are these two things 1) I might find a way to not do it; and 2) my roommate promised to take me to lunch at this really great restaurant if I finished my goal. It is so sad that I am so motivated by food, but there it is. Deal with it.

Ack!

This is just a quick note to say Ack! I am so far behind on my word count (I haven't even hit 40,000 yet and there are only 2 days left!) and I am beginning to feel a bit of the pressure. So, you can guess what I am going to do today. The only thing I am going to do all day. That's right - eat, poop and write. Wish me luck!

Twilight and Excerpt

So, I went to a midnight showing of Twilight last night and it was good. I wouldn't say it was the best movie ever, and it was kinda cheesy at parts (but so is the book if you read it lol that is why I love it!) but I thought overall it was good.

Also, here is an excerpt from my NaNo novel:
“You coming this way?” Kodagan asked.
“Yeah. Do you know where we - I can cross?” she almost forgot she was alone and briefly worried about her companions.
“Keep walking this way, in a few minutes you will come across some rocks you can use to cross.”
Sure enough, he was right. Soon there were some large, flat, dry rocks placed perfect distance apart from each other all the way across the river. Addison adjusted her bag and made to jump for the first one.
“Wait!” Kodagan yelled from the opposing shore.
She stopped herself so hard that she fell over backwards. She stood, glad that he was on the opposite shore from her so he couldn’t see how red her face was. “What?” she asked after regaining her composure.
“The rocks, they start sinking as soon as you are on them, so you have to go fast or else the river will wash you away. And don’t miss either,” he counseled.
“Great,” she said sarcastically. “As if this wasn’t hard enough anyway.”
“You can do it!” he encouraged.
She raised her eyes skeptically and then prepared herself to jump again.
The first one was easy, it was more of a step than a jump. The second was about the same. She was so quick at these ones that she didn’t even notice them start to sink when she was on them. The third one was a bit further away, but just a little. The fourth was again a bit further away – so far that she had to stop for a minute on rock three and really prepare herself for the jump and this time she did notice the rock she was on begin to sink before her feet both left it. It was the same for rocks four, five and six. Seven and eight were pretty close again, probably to give her a reprieve before nine, which was further than any of the rest had been. She started at the very back of rock eight which she was on and did a little running intro before jumping onto rock nine. Once there she saw how far away Kodagan still was on the shore.
The distance looked so far that she even said “Oh no!” out loud.
“You can do it!” Kodagan assured her. “Come on!”
Addison took a few quick breaths, stood as far back as she could and took a running leap towards the far shore. As soon as her feet left the rock (which was very low) she imagined herself making the leap with distance to spare. Her magic combined with her physical strength worked together and she made it easily across the last bit of river.
“Looks like someone has improved a lot,” Kodagan said, smiling at her crookedly.
Addison was so ecstatic at making the seemingly impossible leap that she threw her arms around him and hugged him tight. She inhaled his smell and felt his chest under her cheek and almost lost herself in his arms. Then she realized what she was doing and pulled away quickly, embarrassed again.
“How are you okay?” she asked, trying to distract them both from her embarrassment.
“That is an odd question,” he laughed at her.
“I know, I just … thought you had been … caught. And you didn’t meet me,” she said, trying to not look to hurt.
“I know, I feel really bad about that. I was caught,” he said simply.
Addison waited for him to continue and when he didn’t she prodded him with “but then…?”
His face darkened for a brief moment. “I escaped, but it took a little longer than I thought. And by then you were gone.” He explained.
If she hadn’t seen the flash of something else first she might have believed him. “Oh,” she said. He could tell she didn’t believe him. “I am glad you are here now though.”
His face darkened again, ”I’m sorry.”
“Wh-“ she started but before she could even ask she felt a blow in her abdomen. She looked down, shocked, and saw a dagger sticking out of her.
“For that,” he whispered and swallowed hard. The look on his face was that of pure pain and self-hatred before he pulled the dagger out of her gut and pushed her backwards into the river.

Finishing What You Started

So, first I want to mention that this is my 100th post! Yay! That is quite a milestone. For me at least.

Also, I want to talk more about my story. It is going pretty good. I am a little behind. I am only at 20,000 words (give or take a few) right now and it is the 16th (gulp) but I am going to work on it again after I post and then potty. (not that you wanted to know that but ... whatev). My roommate said that she thinks I am not going to finish. I get why she said that - I do have a track record of not finishing things I start. I have about 10 unfinished knitting projects sitting at various places in my house, not to mention every other story that I have written has only been a half of a story. Also, I keep saying things like "I am going to take the GRE" and "I am going to apply to grad school" and I don't even do that. So, based on that, I really don't finish stuff, and I can see why she said I wouldn't finish this. But, that comment just makes me want to do it even more. To prove her wrong and to prove to myself that when I really want to I CAN finish something.

Also, I posted an excerpt on Facebook. If you want to read it go there. If you don't have a facebook profile, you should get one! Or I will just post an excerpt on here later. Hopefully today sometime. We will see.

Behind...

Okay, so I am totally behind in the novel writing, but I am going to catchup. Don't worry. I just have to take a quiz tomorrow so I can't write then at all (gulp, that makes me even more behind) but then I can write on Thurs and I will have Fri off so I can write even more that day. I will catch up by the end of the weekend! I will do it if it kills me! Okay, not if it kills me, but you get it. I will get there. Wish me luck. And tell me some monsters my main character can meet in the woods darn it!

Word Count Widget

Look what I did ----->

Now you can keep up with my word count - that is as long as I keep it updated.

Sigh of Relief ....

... moment over. Mostly. Relax.

Ignore This Post

Okay, so do what the title says ... I just ....
I just had a huge, overwhelming moment of self-loathing and self-pity and self-hatred (see how self-centric this is? that's why you should ignore it).
I hate myself sometimes. Not always. But sometimes. Esp right now. Don't worry though, it'll pass in about 10 minutes.

NaNoWriMo Characters

So, I have been working on getting ready for NaNoWriMo (which is national novel writing month if you don't know - you can find more stuff about it here)and one thing I have done is a bunch of character sketches for my novel. I also did a basic outline (which I may or may not follow - lol). Here are the character sketches.

Addison – FMC. Knows little to nothing about her life. Her abilities increase as she gains experience at things such as fighting and magic. Starts off with middle levels of strength, stamina, intelligence, and magic ability. As she goes throughout certain tasks these levels increase. Has 3 lives. Has a magical map that she can open and then magically transport herself to anyplace she has been. Bottom corner of map has stats and she can see her abilities increase.
Akuma – Baddie. Goal is to rule the world like a video game. All people are drones except a select few who adore him and 13 previously selected potential heroes. Addison is one potential hero.
Colbie – girl who also has a map and some coherency but not as much as Addison
Beck – boy who is head over heels for Addison. Can only say a few pre-approved phrases, but follows and helps as much as possible.
Kodagan – Akuma’s right hand man. Is put under a magical spell to follow Akuma. Has a problem with being a murderer (not a good trait for an evil henchman).
Manannan – old magic teacher whose loyalties are often called into question. Addison is never sure if he is on her side or not. Gives good advice most of the time … we think.
Plus various other townspeople and cityfolk.

Now I know you are all thinking this sounds kinda videogame-ish, but I will post excerpts and it will all make sense. It should be good. I am way excited. C'mon November!

NaNoWriMo

So, I am going to participate in NaNoWriMo this year again, and I am way excited. I am better prepared (in that I know I am going to do it ahead of time and can actually think of a plot). I made a banner with my tentative title. Don't worry, I won't really call it this, but I thought I would post it anyway, since I haven't posted in forever. I will post my word count and I will also post excerpts. No worries. I am going to need a break from straight writing sometime right?


Oh and, I know that isn't really my name, but I thought it would be a good pen-name. :)

My Klutziness

Okay, so lately everything I have said has been contradicted.
1) At work we had some regulations change and their reasoning in part was that there are sometimes animals in this hallway at work and I said "that's stupid, we almost never have animals running down the hall." Next day, I let an animal loose in the hall (but caught it very quickly).
2) Well, this one I can't really post details of, but I said "I am not afraid of being bitten" and then I was bitten about 10 minutes later (not hard but still)
3) My roommate has a scooter and I was taking it for a joy ride. She said "Don't crash it" and I said "no worries, I will be fine" Next thing you know the scooter and I are up on the sidewalk and I have some pretty good roadrash on my arm. With a nice bruise all around it too.





On the upside though, the roomie couldn't figure out why her horn wasn't working, but after the crash, the horn works fine. Just call me Ms. FixIt. Lol

Best Sign

So the other day I was driving down the road - I can't remember which road or which day - everything in the last little while has been blurring together. But anyway, I was driving down the road and I saw the best sign stuck to a post on the side of the road. It was kinda on a bridge and so there were guardrails and the sign was on one of the gaurdrail posts, but it was higher up than that. Maybe it was on a sign post. Anyway, it was written on yellow construction paper, and it was in a bunch of different colored markers. It said in bold on top 'ISABELLA', then the second line said 'Call Tim'. Then on the very bottom it had a phone number. I imagined that Isabella had been thinking about getting a new job in Oregon but she was dating Tim and wasn't sure about leaving him. They got in a fight so she packed her car and left. He kept trying to call her, but of course she didn't answer (she's pissed) so he goes on Facebook and meets some random stranger from Oregon who is a friend of a friend (he obviously doesn't personally know anyone in Oregon). He convinces this stranger to make the sign for him, and traverse the dangers of stopping his car in the middle of a busy road to hang this sign. Tim does all this in the time it takes Isabella to drive to Oregon. She sees the sign. She calls him. There are tears and "I love you"s and "I'm sorry"s. She already accepted the job in Oregon and she can't quit before starting since she signed all these papers saying that if she quit in the first year she would have to pay back the moving stipend they gave her. So then Tim decideds to drop everything and just up and quits his job and moves to Oregon so he can be with her. Sigh. I wish it was me.

Huh? Really?

Okay, I suck at updating. It is just that, well, work is crazy. It always is in the summers for me. I am thinking of quitting. But soon the craziness will end ... Friday is the last day! Then on to normality. Sort of. My boss is already talking about next summer but she doesn't know that I don't plan on being here. Anyone got a good job for me?

Things

Well it has been a while and I haven't posted. Mostly I have thought about posting but then I get home from work and all I want to do is sleep. What can I say, my job is crazy in the summer. A few things have happened lately. Well, a lot of crazy work things have happened lately, but since I am not really at liberty to post about those I will at least write about the few things that I do feel like I can disclose.

One thing that happened is that I won tickets to go see Maroon 5 in concert! When listening to the radio in my car I often will hear the cue to 'text-to-win'. If I am sitting at a red light and can text I will do it sometimes. The other day the radio called me to tell me that I won tickets to a concert. Woot! So I think the concert is in Portland on Sept 20. I am excited. I usually don't win things.

The other thing that happened recently was my fingernail finally came off. Ew, right? Well for a long time it was just hanging by two little pieces - on on each side of my nail and the whole middle section was unattached. I was beginning to worry about it getting moldy underneath or something. And, I couldn't stop playing with it - it was like a loose tooth. So, at work the other day one side disconnected and then later in the day I went to brush some crumbs off me and the other side came off (ripped off actually, that one did hurt a bit). But now it is off and gross looking and I am going to have to keep a band-aid on it until if grows out the rest of the way (I have about half a nail on there). If you want to see it though, just ask. I might even post a pic sometime .... if you are lucky!

Well, I am off for now to watch my recent netflix acquisition. Bye for now!

Red Cross

So, yesterday I got a letter from the American Red Cross (remember in my last post how I mentioned that I gave blood). Anywway, this letter I get says that on initial tests of my blood they show that I have antibodies for Hepatitis C Virus! Upon further testing they find, of course, that it is negative and I really don't have any antibodies for that. But, because of that one positive test result I can never give blood again! I think it is a bit stupid. I mean, it looks to me like they screwed up and now I am being punished! Well, I guess technically they are the ones not getting anymore blood from me, but still. It is frustrating. At least I have a good reason not to give blood now, eh? I would have been more worried it if was Herpes (because of work - no one think anything bad there!)

Sucky Poster

Well, I am a sucky poster. Especially as of late. I guess I just have been busy. Busy getting things ready for the summer at work, trying to get finances in order and stuff like that, trying to get my life in order. You know, doing little things. Lol.

I have been working on my story but I haven't done anything on it for a while - I have been a bit busy. Let me tell you about my week. Monday was family home evening for my ward. Tuesday was the night my friend got back to town so we went to the movies. Wednesday I went to bed way early (after doing some laundry) and I really needed it! Thursday I gave blood then went to play pool with some friends. Friday after work my roommates and some other friends and I went camping. Saturday we (everyone who was camping and more) went rafting down the Deschutes river. Then when we got back we played some games with some other friends. Then on Sunday (today) I went to church and then afterwards I watched the movie 'Jane Eyre' (the masterpiece theatre version) that is 4 hours long. Whew! What a week. I am glad I did some fun stuff though, that means that I enjoyed myself before work gets crazy - which happens tomorrow. Wish me luck! So this next week I am just going to try to survive work and I am going to work on my story, although I don't think that I am going to be finished it by the deadline for the contest I want to enter. Sadness :( But good thing it is a annual contest and they have deadlines 4 times a year, every year. So if I don't get it finished I can enter it at a later date. And I might work on other things to submit to other contests too. We will see.

My Story

Well, I have been writing a story ... I have been working on it a long time actually. On and off, that is why it is only like, 11 pages long so far. Here is an excerpt:

"In her dream she was back in the gas station. The situation played through again. The man waved the gun in her face, she asked stupid questions, the police arrived. This time when he pointed the gun at the boy she made the decision – she screamed out “NO”. The man with the gun turned fluidly and pulled the trigger, as if he had planned to do that all along, and shot Lauren right in the face. In her dream she could feel the bullet shatter her cheekbone and penetrate her brain, but strangely, it didn’t hurt. She assumed that was because of the adrenaline. She saw the police bust in as the man pulled the trigger again. In her dream he only managed to squeeze off two shots, the second one ricocheting innocently off the metal magazine stand next to the young boy.

When Lauren woke up again she was confused. She remembered being shot in the face, but she still felt no pain. She reached her hands up and touched her cheek where the bullet had hit her. She could feel a scar where the bullet had entered. Lauren was suddenly very confused. How long had it been since the robbery? Did she imagine the boy dying? Did she imagine going home and seeing Joel? She sat up from where she laid and looked around. The room was familiar but she couldn’t place how she knew it. She stood and began to feel along the wall for a light switch. She finally found one and flipped it on. Finally she recognized the room she was in. This had been her bedroom when she was younger. This was the house her mother had died in."

Not the best, I know, but I think it is kinda fun. And I am having fun working on it. It takes my mind off all the stress that I am feeling about work and stuff like that. Just thought I would let you all know what is on my mind lately. :)

New Post

I went to Utah this last weekend for the weddings of two of my cousins (who are both younger than me by the way). It was good and bad. I saw a lot of people I hadn't seen in a long time, but not everyone. I got asked the 'are you dating anyone yet?' question about a million awkward times. I turned 25. A cousin of mine who is about twelve asked me how many guys I have dated. I told her and she didn't believe me. I have felt pretty crappy about myself since. I should have lied.

When It Rains ...

It pours! No joke. And I am not just saying that because I live in Oregon and I have learned all about the rain (although I have).

No, the reason for the title is forthcoming.

May 8 - I broke my finger.
May9 - There is an ... incident ... at work. I am not going to go into details since with my job I don't feel comfortable just plastering things all over the internet (I guess I feel like I could be targeted by certain groups eventually). Anyway, if you know me and want to ask, you can, but it isn't that big of a deal, it was just surprising. There was a similar incident less than two weeks before, but I can't remember the date so I didn't include it in my list ... but still ...
May 19 - My boss is trying to get a grant out and her 'secretary' ends up crying due to all the stress.
May 20 - Boss leaves for a month.
May 21 - My co-worker goes to the doctor after work and his doctor tells him that he needs to take a 4 week medical leave for stress related condition.
May 22 - Deal with the news of co-workers medical leave.
May 23 - My Dad whose health has been failing steadily over the past week has a stroke and is admitted to hospital (he is going to be fine ... don't worry).
May 24 - My roommate's birthday. My other friend had a birthday on the 20th and mine is on the 30th so we have a party. We take a trip to the lake and a man drowns in front of our eyes. http://www.kptv.com/news/16389272/detail.html
May 25 - Nothing ... so far.

So you can see that much has happened in the last month or so (not even) and most of it bad (I guess a party is not a bad thing). I am not saying all this to make you feel bad for me. I guess I am just saying it because ... I don't know why. But is seems like this stuff happens all the time. It is like good things and bad things are pulsatile and right now is just a 'bad' pulse. Is it time for a 'good' pulse yet? I hope so.

Things...

So things have been going okay recently. Work has been crazy - but when is that not the case at my job? Today my boss talked to us all about how backlogged we are, then switched some projects around (as if that helps to give us more time - no it just gives us something different to concentrate on). But then she gave us homemade strawberry shortcake to celebrate this one girl at my work winning an award last week and because I broke my finger. Wait? We are celebrating that now? Okay, weird, but I can live with that.

The thing is that my finger isn't really any different looking than the last time I posted pics, so I won't post more. Mostly it is just way more swollen. You know how at the base of your fingernail there is an indent? Mine doesn't have one. It goes straight from fingernail to finger. No indent at all. Sad right? It is strange because it doesn't even look like my finger anymore. It looks like my older brother's finger after he got in a motorcycle accident and ripped out a bunch of tendons (I think). Someone transplanted his finger onto my hand when I wasn't looking! Oh well, I have a follow-up tomorrow so they might drain it then or something. I will let you know.

Squashed Finger!!

So, at work we have this big chamber made for measuring metabolic rate - and it is big and heavy and the top part and the bottom part fit together (the bottom part is wheels) but are not attached. Anyway, my finger got caught between the top and bottom part - just the tip of my middle finger on my left hand - and got squashed. It is broken pretty good. So I got x-rays taken and the lady explained that the finger tip should look like little mushrooms (like the other two do) but the one that got crushed sort of smashed the mushroom. After all the crying (and there was a lot which I think freaked out everyone at work since I really don't cry at all) I thought that is was actually kinda cool so I thought I would post the copies of the x-rays. Is it not the coolest thing that they actually gave me copies of the x-rays?


So, then I took some pics. These pictures don't really do it justice - it looks much cooler than this. The tip is kinda flat, but then it bulges out below that where it is swelling up. The nurse practitioner (who was awesome by the way) said that it would take 4-6 weeks to heal and in that time it would turn lots of 'pretty' colors - so I plan to photo document the entire thing. A nice treat for all my readers (yes, all four of you - lol).



So that was my day yesterday. I am getting pretty decent at typing with 9 fingers instead of 10 and I am getting okay at not banging the darn thing on everything. I have never broken anything before so this is a novel experience for me. So I will keep posting updates. Enjoy the x-rays though! :)

New Post

Well, here it is Monday night and I feel like I should post something ... but exactly what I should post on is eluding me. So I think I will just mention a few things that are random. One is that I am not sure why, but I was really productive today. I had a day off and usually on my days off I just do nothing and lay around, but today I was really productive. I cleaned, I made cookies, I did laundry, I went grocery shopping. I did a lot. I am not sure why ... maybe it was because I was well rested. For once. I almost never feel well rested, but I did for some reason today. I mean, it was probably because I fell asleep for a 'nap' yesterday and slept for like 6 hours. Then I went to bed a few hours later. I have done that before though and still felt just as tired as I had previously.

Also, I have been doing a lot more writing lately. I thought about posting it, but it is really rough so I am not going to. Also, I think if I was going to post it it would have to be on a different blog ... it wouldn't really fit in on this one. But I guess I just wanted to mention that I was doing it.

Anyway, my sudden drive to write more on this post is gone, so I will stop. Sorry if anyone read this expecting something that was actually interesting.

Rant and Rave!

Rant - So my co-workers and I were talking the other day about blogs. One thing we were talking about was why anyone would want to keep a blog. One of my co-workers actually didn't know anything about blogging, which is a little hard to imagine since I thought everyone in the world knew about blogs (even my Mom! so that is amazing!). So we were telling him that it is a lot like a journal, only published online so everyone can read it. Well then he asked, why wouldn't you just write a real journal that everyone can't read? And I thought about that. I guess everyone who keeps a blog has a little bit of an exhibitionist in them. I mean, I make sure that I don't write anything that I would feel weird having a stranger know about me, but still, I obviously want someone to know something. I guess I just like the idea that maybe someone will read it and know what I mean.

Rave - I just want to take a minute to mention how much I really really love my new car. It is such a smooth quiet ride compared to the jeep. I will always have a fondness in my heart for said jeep, but I love my new Mazda so much more. And I tested the volume on the radio the other day and it goes all the way up to 34! Sometimes I think that even 8 is too loud! And I have always been a product of my father and I love to go driving around just for the heck of it, but I especially love to now in my new car. And with gas prices being what they are the fact that I go driving just for the heck of it says something. At least I think it does.

Heere's Johnny!

So, I know that I have been procrastinating, but it is hard for my to update my blog when I am home because there is not really a good internet connection at my parents' house. So this is the update - with pictures of my little nephew John Daniel. I know that Grandma put my blog address in the family newsletter and told people to look here for pictures of the little guy so I have been feeling guilty about not posting pics sooner. Oh well, here they are. He is totally the cutest baby ever, and he has a really good disposition - even when he cries it is more funny than anything. Not a loud crier either. We tried to take pics of him smiling, but it was a hard thing to do so this is the best you will get for a while. Enjoy the cuteness! Also, for those who didn't know, I dyed my hair back to dark. It looks crappy in the last photo but still I like it much more since I don't have to keep re-bleaching it all the time.

My Car!

Well, I finally took pictures of my car and I thought I would post them. To tell the truth, I only took 2, 1 from the passenger side and the other from the drivers side, so they look almost the same, so I am only posting one. I am going to post the one from the drivers side because you can see my house in the background! Well, the house I live in .... but that still makes it mine for now right...?

My New Car!

Well, I did it. As you can tell from the title of the post, I bought a new car. It is a 2005 Mazda 6 and it has about 24,000 miles on it (give or take a few) and I love it! I just wanted to put this on here to let everyone know. Also, I am putting a pic on here that I got online. It isn't exactly like mine - mine is green - but it is pretty darn close. I plan to take pics to post on here soon but for now this should placate those who want to see it.

Inspired!

Look at me, posting twice in one day! Woo! Actually I was inspired by my friend Chelsea who just got her hair cut and it looks awesome - to put pics of my (semi) new haircut up so you can see it. I have been planning on posting pics like this forever so ... thanks Chels for the inspiration. Here is my hair. Also, sorry about the weird 'MySpace' angle on the pics, but I was taking them before going to bed one night and I was too tired to care how nice they turned out.

Half-Hearted Posting

Well, I am putting up a post but it is only half-heartedly. I have been really sucking at posting on my blog lately and I just wanted to put something new on here so that I could say I don't suck too bad.

Anyway, I have bad news. My car is on it's last legs. So sad. I love my little jeep (my dad would argue with me here that it is HIS little jeep, but you get the idea). A while back it overheated a little and then wouldn't start and when I took it in and got it fixed the mechanic mentioned to me that the exhaust manifold was cracked. He also said he understood that money is always important and since I had to pay about $600 to get the rest of the car fixed and I probably couldn't afford to fix it I could leave it as long as I don't do too much highway driving. So, that is still wrong with it (I never got it fixed) but now to add to that it is leaking oil in several places. I took it to the mechanic again and he said that it really wasn't worth it to fix it since it had so many kilometers on it.

My dad's suggestion is to just drive it until it dies but then I would be stuck with no car. So I am trying to take care of the problem now. The only problem is that I don't know if I want to buy a car here in Oregon and register it and stuff and get my license changed over because I am not sure how long I am going to live here in Oregon and it might be more hassle than it is worth. But then again, I am not sure I want to continue what I am doing which is have my car registered in Canada. Any thoughts?

Rare and Unwelcome

So, in the last however many years of my life, I can't remember how many times I have been sick - but just so you know, it is not a lot. And then what happens?! In the last three weeks I have been sick twice! Okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration but it is pretty close to the truth. I got sick a few weeks ago with the whole head plugged and coughing thing and then my voice was messed up for about a week afterwards. Just when I was starting to feel fine - I had a bit of a residual cough but that was it - I got sick again! This time it was kinda the same - my head was plugged and pounding but I was dizzy as all get out and achy all over. I hate being sick. I am glad it is rare for me, but let me just say - I can't wait to feel better. I was so sick that yesterday I slept practically all day. I would sleep, then get up to go to the bathroom, then I would go back to sleep (did I mention the copious amounts of Nyquil?) I felt somewhat better today, but not a ton. Grr. I just want to be healthy!!

Not the Long Awaited Post .... Sorry

The title of this post was a disclaimer because this is not the post that will explain what has been going on in my life for the last month that made me not post. No this post will just be my musings, that were sparked by watching a preview for this movie. It is called Penelope and it is about a girl who has a pig nose and will until she can find someone to accept her as she is until death do they part. So basically, as it was described to me by someone else, until she finds her 'true love'. I guess this got me to thinking about that term. True love.

Let's also bring up the movie 'Beauty and the Beast'. It is a great movie. I love it. One of my favourites by Disney. But the curse he is under states that he will be that way until he can learn to love another and earn her love in return (or something like that, I'm quoting off the top of my head here!) Anyway, when do you know that you have earned someone's love? That is really what this is driving at. I mean if you are cursed until you find your true love, is it just until you meet them, or until they love you, or until they tell you they love you. Because those three time points in time can be significantly different. I mean, all three could never happen, but some people never say the words "I love you" so if that was the case you would be totally screwed right?

In 'Beauty and the Beast' the curse breaks when she tells him, but maybe that is the same time she realizes she is in love with him (but I don't think it is the actual moment she 'falls in love with him'). Anyway, I was just wondering about that - because it would actually be quite convenient for you if it was when you met that person right, because the curse would end and that would tell you that you had just met your true love. If that is the case then put that curse on me because it is hard to know otherwise.

Also, I am obviously totally ignoring the fact that I totally disagree with the term 'true love' in general and that I think that it is stupid to think that you have one and only one person that you were meant to be with your whole life and that if you miss them then you are in big trouble. But if that was true, and curses could be put on people, then how is it determined that the curse is over. I guess that is all I am asking. Whatever. If anyone has insight let me know. Thanks!