Monday, October 16, 2006

Random things

I have a few things that I have been thinking about lately. One is that I recently watched the entire series of 'Prison Break' on DVD. I didn't think I would like it, and it wasn't until I watched the first episode that I was hooked. I really like the moral issues it brings up, and also I like that it shows that no matter where you are in life you can meet good people - even in jail. Not that I am planning on going to jail, but there are still some good people there. There are bad ones too, you just have to know how to idnetify which are which. But how can you do that? It is almost impossible to tell from one meeting (or even several if the person is really clever) what a person is really like. If they want you to think they are a certain way, you will most likely gain that opinion of them no matter what.

That leads me to my second thought of the day (I know, two thoughts in one day is pushing it, but they sorta link together). Some friends and I are setting up a group date for Friday, and none of us are dating anyone right now so we all set each other up. It is definitely a large group date (there will be about 12 people there, maybe more) so it should be tons of fun. The thing is that having lived in my culture as long as I have (I am a Mormon and I go to BYU) I know what guys are looking for. I could easily pretend to be the perfect little Susie-homemaker who loves to cook and have kids and wants to be a stay at home mom etc etc. It isn't that I don't want those things, but I am not as sweet as sugar like some girls are and I don't really want to be. So I would never pretend to be 'that girl' even though I easily could. The thing is, knowing I could do so so easily, means that obviously he could do so quite easily as well. So how do I know that he is being genuine? Especially because only one other person who is going to be there knows him and I am sure this other person will be distracted with his own date, so he really could be whoever he wants to be.

It is like that Savage Garden song about how when you are on the telephone with someone you can be whoever you want to be. That can happen in real life too, not just on the phone. You are a little more constricted in real life because you can't say you are Madonna or something, but you can pretend to be anyone (like Dharma always did in 'Dharma and Greg'). So, I know I am being genuine (it takes too much energy to lie) but how do I know that everyone else is. Especially becuase I think sometimes people are being unintentionally dishonest. But does that make it okay? Or if your intentions are good (like so you don't hurt someones feelings) is it okay to lie? It is so hard to think you know someone and then find out you were totally wrong the whole time. It is hard enough because I think when we meet someone we put people into categories and so we fit people into these neat little categories, so we have ourselves to try to overcome, we don't need more misconceptions forced on us on top of that.

Well, I know this was a random post and I am not sure how much sense it makes to anyone reading it, but I had a few thoughts so I thought 'hey why not post them?'. I hope you made some sense of what I wrote.


Thirdmango said...

I'm going to assume I'm the guy. :) It's either me, or Yarjka. I am excited about the date. Some thoughts on this post. I'm going to try and be myself, I do have a tough time when around people I don't know. But be forewarned, I am a bit different then your average "guy". I am from provo and very active, but I am different. So believe me when I say, pretending to be susie homemaker will not be what I want, also like you, not to say I don't want some of those, but I'm not looking for someone like that.

I do like the fact that you mentioned it takes a couple of times to get to know someone, because from experience, I don't often give good first impressions. Most of my best friends admit that their first time they didn't expect to become friends with me. So remember, catergories, though easy are often uinreliable. :)

I am excited, and I am best when in a group. Read over my blog, it's a lot about me and good stuff. Anyways, have a good time and I'll see you tomorrow, make sure to say who you are when I see you whether you're my date or not, and whether you are the annonymous person or someone else. :)

exclusive_remedy said...

Well, I must say 3M you are a wrong! I am not your date for tomorrow, and neither is anonymous (but you wish I was now that you read my blog, right?) but we are enjoying seeing you try to figure it out. I will, however, pass the message along to her about the whole first meeting thing ;)

Looking forward to meeting you and Yarjka tomorrow though! Don't worry, we will tell you who we are - anonymous and I both.

Yarjka said...

I sometimes try and make a bad first impression on purpose ... I'll try not to do that.