I did it!

I did it, I did it, I did it, yay! (yes I was singing that to the tune from Dora the Explorer as I typed it ... you got a problem with that?)

Gah!

I actually like my MC more now after writing about her for so long. And I have been trying to do one final push to finish by tomorrow and I just had a realization about what has to happen that in all likeliness is going to kill her off. I am so sad I almost want to stop writing! I don't want to kill her but I don't know how I can save her and not have the story end up really stupid. Grr. The only thing keeping me writing are these two things 1) I might find a way to not do it; and 2) my roommate promised to take me to lunch at this really great restaurant if I finished my goal. It is so sad that I am so motivated by food, but there it is. Deal with it.

Ack!

This is just a quick note to say Ack! I am so far behind on my word count (I haven't even hit 40,000 yet and there are only 2 days left!) and I am beginning to feel a bit of the pressure. So, you can guess what I am going to do today. The only thing I am going to do all day. That's right - eat, poop and write. Wish me luck!

Twilight and Excerpt

So, I went to a midnight showing of Twilight last night and it was good. I wouldn't say it was the best movie ever, and it was kinda cheesy at parts (but so is the book if you read it lol that is why I love it!) but I thought overall it was good.

Also, here is an excerpt from my NaNo novel:
“You coming this way?” Kodagan asked.
“Yeah. Do you know where we - I can cross?” she almost forgot she was alone and briefly worried about her companions.
“Keep walking this way, in a few minutes you will come across some rocks you can use to cross.”
Sure enough, he was right. Soon there were some large, flat, dry rocks placed perfect distance apart from each other all the way across the river. Addison adjusted her bag and made to jump for the first one.
“Wait!” Kodagan yelled from the opposing shore.
She stopped herself so hard that she fell over backwards. She stood, glad that he was on the opposite shore from her so he couldn’t see how red her face was. “What?” she asked after regaining her composure.
“The rocks, they start sinking as soon as you are on them, so you have to go fast or else the river will wash you away. And don’t miss either,” he counseled.
“Great,” she said sarcastically. “As if this wasn’t hard enough anyway.”
“You can do it!” he encouraged.
She raised her eyes skeptically and then prepared herself to jump again.
The first one was easy, it was more of a step than a jump. The second was about the same. She was so quick at these ones that she didn’t even notice them start to sink when she was on them. The third one was a bit further away, but just a little. The fourth was again a bit further away – so far that she had to stop for a minute on rock three and really prepare herself for the jump and this time she did notice the rock she was on begin to sink before her feet both left it. It was the same for rocks four, five and six. Seven and eight were pretty close again, probably to give her a reprieve before nine, which was further than any of the rest had been. She started at the very back of rock eight which she was on and did a little running intro before jumping onto rock nine. Once there she saw how far away Kodagan still was on the shore.
The distance looked so far that she even said “Oh no!” out loud.
“You can do it!” Kodagan assured her. “Come on!”
Addison took a few quick breaths, stood as far back as she could and took a running leap towards the far shore. As soon as her feet left the rock (which was very low) she imagined herself making the leap with distance to spare. Her magic combined with her physical strength worked together and she made it easily across the last bit of river.
“Looks like someone has improved a lot,” Kodagan said, smiling at her crookedly.
Addison was so ecstatic at making the seemingly impossible leap that she threw her arms around him and hugged him tight. She inhaled his smell and felt his chest under her cheek and almost lost herself in his arms. Then she realized what she was doing and pulled away quickly, embarrassed again.
“How are you okay?” she asked, trying to distract them both from her embarrassment.
“That is an odd question,” he laughed at her.
“I know, I just … thought you had been … caught. And you didn’t meet me,” she said, trying to not look to hurt.
“I know, I feel really bad about that. I was caught,” he said simply.
Addison waited for him to continue and when he didn’t she prodded him with “but then…?”
His face darkened for a brief moment. “I escaped, but it took a little longer than I thought. And by then you were gone.” He explained.
If she hadn’t seen the flash of something else first she might have believed him. “Oh,” she said. He could tell she didn’t believe him. “I am glad you are here now though.”
His face darkened again, ”I’m sorry.”
“Wh-“ she started but before she could even ask she felt a blow in her abdomen. She looked down, shocked, and saw a dagger sticking out of her.
“For that,” he whispered and swallowed hard. The look on his face was that of pure pain and self-hatred before he pulled the dagger out of her gut and pushed her backwards into the river.

Finishing What You Started

So, first I want to mention that this is my 100th post! Yay! That is quite a milestone. For me at least.

Also, I want to talk more about my story. It is going pretty good. I am a little behind. I am only at 20,000 words (give or take a few) right now and it is the 16th (gulp) but I am going to work on it again after I post and then potty. (not that you wanted to know that but ... whatev). My roommate said that she thinks I am not going to finish. I get why she said that - I do have a track record of not finishing things I start. I have about 10 unfinished knitting projects sitting at various places in my house, not to mention every other story that I have written has only been a half of a story. Also, I keep saying things like "I am going to take the GRE" and "I am going to apply to grad school" and I don't even do that. So, based on that, I really don't finish stuff, and I can see why she said I wouldn't finish this. But, that comment just makes me want to do it even more. To prove her wrong and to prove to myself that when I really want to I CAN finish something.

Also, I posted an excerpt on Facebook. If you want to read it go there. If you don't have a facebook profile, you should get one! Or I will just post an excerpt on here later. Hopefully today sometime. We will see.

Behind...

Okay, so I am totally behind in the novel writing, but I am going to catchup. Don't worry. I just have to take a quiz tomorrow so I can't write then at all (gulp, that makes me even more behind) but then I can write on Thurs and I will have Fri off so I can write even more that day. I will catch up by the end of the weekend! I will do it if it kills me! Okay, not if it kills me, but you get it. I will get there. Wish me luck. And tell me some monsters my main character can meet in the woods darn it!

Word Count Widget

Look what I did ----->

Now you can keep up with my word count - that is as long as I keep it updated.

Sigh of Relief ....

... moment over. Mostly. Relax.

Ignore This Post

Okay, so do what the title says ... I just ....
I just had a huge, overwhelming moment of self-loathing and self-pity and self-hatred (see how self-centric this is? that's why you should ignore it).
I hate myself sometimes. Not always. But sometimes. Esp right now. Don't worry though, it'll pass in about 10 minutes.

NaNoWriMo Characters

So, I have been working on getting ready for NaNoWriMo (which is national novel writing month if you don't know - you can find more stuff about it here)and one thing I have done is a bunch of character sketches for my novel. I also did a basic outline (which I may or may not follow - lol). Here are the character sketches.

Addison – FMC. Knows little to nothing about her life. Her abilities increase as she gains experience at things such as fighting and magic. Starts off with middle levels of strength, stamina, intelligence, and magic ability. As she goes throughout certain tasks these levels increase. Has 3 lives. Has a magical map that she can open and then magically transport herself to anyplace she has been. Bottom corner of map has stats and she can see her abilities increase.
Akuma – Baddie. Goal is to rule the world like a video game. All people are drones except a select few who adore him and 13 previously selected potential heroes. Addison is one potential hero.
Colbie – girl who also has a map and some coherency but not as much as Addison
Beck – boy who is head over heels for Addison. Can only say a few pre-approved phrases, but follows and helps as much as possible.
Kodagan – Akuma’s right hand man. Is put under a magical spell to follow Akuma. Has a problem with being a murderer (not a good trait for an evil henchman).
Manannan – old magic teacher whose loyalties are often called into question. Addison is never sure if he is on her side or not. Gives good advice most of the time … we think.
Plus various other townspeople and cityfolk.

Now I know you are all thinking this sounds kinda videogame-ish, but I will post excerpts and it will all make sense. It should be good. I am way excited. C'mon November!

NaNoWriMo

So, I am going to participate in NaNoWriMo this year again, and I am way excited. I am better prepared (in that I know I am going to do it ahead of time and can actually think of a plot). I made a banner with my tentative title. Don't worry, I won't really call it this, but I thought I would post it anyway, since I haven't posted in forever. I will post my word count and I will also post excerpts. No worries. I am going to need a break from straight writing sometime right?


Oh and, I know that isn't really my name, but I thought it would be a good pen-name. :)

My Klutziness

Okay, so lately everything I have said has been contradicted.
1) At work we had some regulations change and their reasoning in part was that there are sometimes animals in this hallway at work and I said "that's stupid, we almost never have animals running down the hall." Next day, I let an animal loose in the hall (but caught it very quickly).
2) Well, this one I can't really post details of, but I said "I am not afraid of being bitten" and then I was bitten about 10 minutes later (not hard but still)
3) My roommate has a scooter and I was taking it for a joy ride. She said "Don't crash it" and I said "no worries, I will be fine" Next thing you know the scooter and I are up on the sidewalk and I have some pretty good roadrash on my arm. With a nice bruise all around it too.





On the upside though, the roomie couldn't figure out why her horn wasn't working, but after the crash, the horn works fine. Just call me Ms. FixIt. Lol

Best Sign

So the other day I was driving down the road - I can't remember which road or which day - everything in the last little while has been blurring together. But anyway, I was driving down the road and I saw the best sign stuck to a post on the side of the road. It was kinda on a bridge and so there were guardrails and the sign was on one of the gaurdrail posts, but it was higher up than that. Maybe it was on a sign post. Anyway, it was written on yellow construction paper, and it was in a bunch of different colored markers. It said in bold on top 'ISABELLA', then the second line said 'Call Tim'. Then on the very bottom it had a phone number. I imagined that Isabella had been thinking about getting a new job in Oregon but she was dating Tim and wasn't sure about leaving him. They got in a fight so she packed her car and left. He kept trying to call her, but of course she didn't answer (she's pissed) so he goes on Facebook and meets some random stranger from Oregon who is a friend of a friend (he obviously doesn't personally know anyone in Oregon). He convinces this stranger to make the sign for him, and traverse the dangers of stopping his car in the middle of a busy road to hang this sign. Tim does all this in the time it takes Isabella to drive to Oregon. She sees the sign. She calls him. There are tears and "I love you"s and "I'm sorry"s. She already accepted the job in Oregon and she can't quit before starting since she signed all these papers saying that if she quit in the first year she would have to pay back the moving stipend they gave her. So then Tim decideds to drop everything and just up and quits his job and moves to Oregon so he can be with her. Sigh. I wish it was me.

Huh? Really?

Okay, I suck at updating. It is just that, well, work is crazy. It always is in the summers for me. I am thinking of quitting. But soon the craziness will end ... Friday is the last day! Then on to normality. Sort of. My boss is already talking about next summer but she doesn't know that I don't plan on being here. Anyone got a good job for me?

Things

Well it has been a while and I haven't posted. Mostly I have thought about posting but then I get home from work and all I want to do is sleep. What can I say, my job is crazy in the summer. A few things have happened lately. Well, a lot of crazy work things have happened lately, but since I am not really at liberty to post about those I will at least write about the few things that I do feel like I can disclose.

One thing that happened is that I won tickets to go see Maroon 5 in concert! When listening to the radio in my car I often will hear the cue to 'text-to-win'. If I am sitting at a red light and can text I will do it sometimes. The other day the radio called me to tell me that I won tickets to a concert. Woot! So I think the concert is in Portland on Sept 20. I am excited. I usually don't win things.

The other thing that happened recently was my fingernail finally came off. Ew, right? Well for a long time it was just hanging by two little pieces - on on each side of my nail and the whole middle section was unattached. I was beginning to worry about it getting moldy underneath or something. And, I couldn't stop playing with it - it was like a loose tooth. So, at work the other day one side disconnected and then later in the day I went to brush some crumbs off me and the other side came off (ripped off actually, that one did hurt a bit). But now it is off and gross looking and I am going to have to keep a band-aid on it until if grows out the rest of the way (I have about half a nail on there). If you want to see it though, just ask. I might even post a pic sometime .... if you are lucky!

Well, I am off for now to watch my recent netflix acquisition. Bye for now!

Red Cross

So, yesterday I got a letter from the American Red Cross (remember in my last post how I mentioned that I gave blood). Anywway, this letter I get says that on initial tests of my blood they show that I have antibodies for Hepatitis C Virus! Upon further testing they find, of course, that it is negative and I really don't have any antibodies for that. But, because of that one positive test result I can never give blood again! I think it is a bit stupid. I mean, it looks to me like they screwed up and now I am being punished! Well, I guess technically they are the ones not getting anymore blood from me, but still. It is frustrating. At least I have a good reason not to give blood now, eh? I would have been more worried it if was Herpes (because of work - no one think anything bad there!)

Sucky Poster

Well, I am a sucky poster. Especially as of late. I guess I just have been busy. Busy getting things ready for the summer at work, trying to get finances in order and stuff like that, trying to get my life in order. You know, doing little things. Lol.

I have been working on my story but I haven't done anything on it for a while - I have been a bit busy. Let me tell you about my week. Monday was family home evening for my ward. Tuesday was the night my friend got back to town so we went to the movies. Wednesday I went to bed way early (after doing some laundry) and I really needed it! Thursday I gave blood then went to play pool with some friends. Friday after work my roommates and some other friends and I went camping. Saturday we (everyone who was camping and more) went rafting down the Deschutes river. Then when we got back we played some games with some other friends. Then on Sunday (today) I went to church and then afterwards I watched the movie 'Jane Eyre' (the masterpiece theatre version) that is 4 hours long. Whew! What a week. I am glad I did some fun stuff though, that means that I enjoyed myself before work gets crazy - which happens tomorrow. Wish me luck! So this next week I am just going to try to survive work and I am going to work on my story, although I don't think that I am going to be finished it by the deadline for the contest I want to enter. Sadness :( But good thing it is a annual contest and they have deadlines 4 times a year, every year. So if I don't get it finished I can enter it at a later date. And I might work on other things to submit to other contests too. We will see.

My Story

Well, I have been writing a story ... I have been working on it a long time actually. On and off, that is why it is only like, 11 pages long so far. Here is an excerpt:

"In her dream she was back in the gas station. The situation played through again. The man waved the gun in her face, she asked stupid questions, the police arrived. This time when he pointed the gun at the boy she made the decision – she screamed out “NO”. The man with the gun turned fluidly and pulled the trigger, as if he had planned to do that all along, and shot Lauren right in the face. In her dream she could feel the bullet shatter her cheekbone and penetrate her brain, but strangely, it didn’t hurt. She assumed that was because of the adrenaline. She saw the police bust in as the man pulled the trigger again. In her dream he only managed to squeeze off two shots, the second one ricocheting innocently off the metal magazine stand next to the young boy.

When Lauren woke up again she was confused. She remembered being shot in the face, but she still felt no pain. She reached her hands up and touched her cheek where the bullet had hit her. She could feel a scar where the bullet had entered. Lauren was suddenly very confused. How long had it been since the robbery? Did she imagine the boy dying? Did she imagine going home and seeing Joel? She sat up from where she laid and looked around. The room was familiar but she couldn’t place how she knew it. She stood and began to feel along the wall for a light switch. She finally found one and flipped it on. Finally she recognized the room she was in. This had been her bedroom when she was younger. This was the house her mother had died in."

Not the best, I know, but I think it is kinda fun. And I am having fun working on it. It takes my mind off all the stress that I am feeling about work and stuff like that. Just thought I would let you all know what is on my mind lately. :)

New Post

I went to Utah this last weekend for the weddings of two of my cousins (who are both younger than me by the way). It was good and bad. I saw a lot of people I hadn't seen in a long time, but not everyone. I got asked the 'are you dating anyone yet?' question about a million awkward times. I turned 25. A cousin of mine who is about twelve asked me how many guys I have dated. I told her and she didn't believe me. I have felt pretty crappy about myself since. I should have lied.

When It Rains ...

It pours! No joke. And I am not just saying that because I live in Oregon and I have learned all about the rain (although I have).

No, the reason for the title is forthcoming.

May 8 - I broke my finger.
May9 - There is an ... incident ... at work. I am not going to go into details since with my job I don't feel comfortable just plastering things all over the internet (I guess I feel like I could be targeted by certain groups eventually). Anyway, if you know me and want to ask, you can, but it isn't that big of a deal, it was just surprising. There was a similar incident less than two weeks before, but I can't remember the date so I didn't include it in my list ... but still ...
May 19 - My boss is trying to get a grant out and her 'secretary' ends up crying due to all the stress.
May 20 - Boss leaves for a month.
May 21 - My co-worker goes to the doctor after work and his doctor tells him that he needs to take a 4 week medical leave for stress related condition.
May 22 - Deal with the news of co-workers medical leave.
May 23 - My Dad whose health has been failing steadily over the past week has a stroke and is admitted to hospital (he is going to be fine ... don't worry).
May 24 - My roommate's birthday. My other friend had a birthday on the 20th and mine is on the 30th so we have a party. We take a trip to the lake and a man drowns in front of our eyes. http://www.kptv.com/news/16389272/detail.html
May 25 - Nothing ... so far.

So you can see that much has happened in the last month or so (not even) and most of it bad (I guess a party is not a bad thing). I am not saying all this to make you feel bad for me. I guess I am just saying it because ... I don't know why. But is seems like this stuff happens all the time. It is like good things and bad things are pulsatile and right now is just a 'bad' pulse. Is it time for a 'good' pulse yet? I hope so.

Things...

So things have been going okay recently. Work has been crazy - but when is that not the case at my job? Today my boss talked to us all about how backlogged we are, then switched some projects around (as if that helps to give us more time - no it just gives us something different to concentrate on). But then she gave us homemade strawberry shortcake to celebrate this one girl at my work winning an award last week and because I broke my finger. Wait? We are celebrating that now? Okay, weird, but I can live with that.

The thing is that my finger isn't really any different looking than the last time I posted pics, so I won't post more. Mostly it is just way more swollen. You know how at the base of your fingernail there is an indent? Mine doesn't have one. It goes straight from fingernail to finger. No indent at all. Sad right? It is strange because it doesn't even look like my finger anymore. It looks like my older brother's finger after he got in a motorcycle accident and ripped out a bunch of tendons (I think). Someone transplanted his finger onto my hand when I wasn't looking! Oh well, I have a follow-up tomorrow so they might drain it then or something. I will let you know.

Squashed Finger!!

So, at work we have this big chamber made for measuring metabolic rate - and it is big and heavy and the top part and the bottom part fit together (the bottom part is wheels) but are not attached. Anyway, my finger got caught between the top and bottom part - just the tip of my middle finger on my left hand - and got squashed. It is broken pretty good. So I got x-rays taken and the lady explained that the finger tip should look like little mushrooms (like the other two do) but the one that got crushed sort of smashed the mushroom. After all the crying (and there was a lot which I think freaked out everyone at work since I really don't cry at all) I thought that is was actually kinda cool so I thought I would post the copies of the x-rays. Is it not the coolest thing that they actually gave me copies of the x-rays?


So, then I took some pics. These pictures don't really do it justice - it looks much cooler than this. The tip is kinda flat, but then it bulges out below that where it is swelling up. The nurse practitioner (who was awesome by the way) said that it would take 4-6 weeks to heal and in that time it would turn lots of 'pretty' colors - so I plan to photo document the entire thing. A nice treat for all my readers (yes, all four of you - lol).



So that was my day yesterday. I am getting pretty decent at typing with 9 fingers instead of 10 and I am getting okay at not banging the darn thing on everything. I have never broken anything before so this is a novel experience for me. So I will keep posting updates. Enjoy the x-rays though! :)

New Post

Well, here it is Monday night and I feel like I should post something ... but exactly what I should post on is eluding me. So I think I will just mention a few things that are random. One is that I am not sure why, but I was really productive today. I had a day off and usually on my days off I just do nothing and lay around, but today I was really productive. I cleaned, I made cookies, I did laundry, I went grocery shopping. I did a lot. I am not sure why ... maybe it was because I was well rested. For once. I almost never feel well rested, but I did for some reason today. I mean, it was probably because I fell asleep for a 'nap' yesterday and slept for like 6 hours. Then I went to bed a few hours later. I have done that before though and still felt just as tired as I had previously.

Also, I have been doing a lot more writing lately. I thought about posting it, but it is really rough so I am not going to. Also, I think if I was going to post it it would have to be on a different blog ... it wouldn't really fit in on this one. But I guess I just wanted to mention that I was doing it.

Anyway, my sudden drive to write more on this post is gone, so I will stop. Sorry if anyone read this expecting something that was actually interesting.

Rant and Rave!

Rant - So my co-workers and I were talking the other day about blogs. One thing we were talking about was why anyone would want to keep a blog. One of my co-workers actually didn't know anything about blogging, which is a little hard to imagine since I thought everyone in the world knew about blogs (even my Mom! so that is amazing!). So we were telling him that it is a lot like a journal, only published online so everyone can read it. Well then he asked, why wouldn't you just write a real journal that everyone can't read? And I thought about that. I guess everyone who keeps a blog has a little bit of an exhibitionist in them. I mean, I make sure that I don't write anything that I would feel weird having a stranger know about me, but still, I obviously want someone to know something. I guess I just like the idea that maybe someone will read it and know what I mean.

Rave - I just want to take a minute to mention how much I really really love my new car. It is such a smooth quiet ride compared to the jeep. I will always have a fondness in my heart for said jeep, but I love my new Mazda so much more. And I tested the volume on the radio the other day and it goes all the way up to 34! Sometimes I think that even 8 is too loud! And I have always been a product of my father and I love to go driving around just for the heck of it, but I especially love to now in my new car. And with gas prices being what they are the fact that I go driving just for the heck of it says something. At least I think it does.

Heere's Johnny!

So, I know that I have been procrastinating, but it is hard for my to update my blog when I am home because there is not really a good internet connection at my parents' house. So this is the update - with pictures of my little nephew John Daniel. I know that Grandma put my blog address in the family newsletter and told people to look here for pictures of the little guy so I have been feeling guilty about not posting pics sooner. Oh well, here they are. He is totally the cutest baby ever, and he has a really good disposition - even when he cries it is more funny than anything. Not a loud crier either. We tried to take pics of him smiling, but it was a hard thing to do so this is the best you will get for a while. Enjoy the cuteness! Also, for those who didn't know, I dyed my hair back to dark. It looks crappy in the last photo but still I like it much more since I don't have to keep re-bleaching it all the time.

My Car!

Well, I finally took pictures of my car and I thought I would post them. To tell the truth, I only took 2, 1 from the passenger side and the other from the drivers side, so they look almost the same, so I am only posting one. I am going to post the one from the drivers side because you can see my house in the background! Well, the house I live in .... but that still makes it mine for now right...?

My New Car!

Well, I did it. As you can tell from the title of the post, I bought a new car. It is a 2005 Mazda 6 and it has about 24,000 miles on it (give or take a few) and I love it! I just wanted to put this on here to let everyone know. Also, I am putting a pic on here that I got online. It isn't exactly like mine - mine is green - but it is pretty darn close. I plan to take pics to post on here soon but for now this should placate those who want to see it.

Inspired!

Look at me, posting twice in one day! Woo! Actually I was inspired by my friend Chelsea who just got her hair cut and it looks awesome - to put pics of my (semi) new haircut up so you can see it. I have been planning on posting pics like this forever so ... thanks Chels for the inspiration. Here is my hair. Also, sorry about the weird 'MySpace' angle on the pics, but I was taking them before going to bed one night and I was too tired to care how nice they turned out.

Half-Hearted Posting

Well, I am putting up a post but it is only half-heartedly. I have been really sucking at posting on my blog lately and I just wanted to put something new on here so that I could say I don't suck too bad.

Anyway, I have bad news. My car is on it's last legs. So sad. I love my little jeep (my dad would argue with me here that it is HIS little jeep, but you get the idea). A while back it overheated a little and then wouldn't start and when I took it in and got it fixed the mechanic mentioned to me that the exhaust manifold was cracked. He also said he understood that money is always important and since I had to pay about $600 to get the rest of the car fixed and I probably couldn't afford to fix it I could leave it as long as I don't do too much highway driving. So, that is still wrong with it (I never got it fixed) but now to add to that it is leaking oil in several places. I took it to the mechanic again and he said that it really wasn't worth it to fix it since it had so many kilometers on it.

My dad's suggestion is to just drive it until it dies but then I would be stuck with no car. So I am trying to take care of the problem now. The only problem is that I don't know if I want to buy a car here in Oregon and register it and stuff and get my license changed over because I am not sure how long I am going to live here in Oregon and it might be more hassle than it is worth. But then again, I am not sure I want to continue what I am doing which is have my car registered in Canada. Any thoughts?

Rare and Unwelcome

So, in the last however many years of my life, I can't remember how many times I have been sick - but just so you know, it is not a lot. And then what happens?! In the last three weeks I have been sick twice! Okay, that might be a bit of an exaggeration but it is pretty close to the truth. I got sick a few weeks ago with the whole head plugged and coughing thing and then my voice was messed up for about a week afterwards. Just when I was starting to feel fine - I had a bit of a residual cough but that was it - I got sick again! This time it was kinda the same - my head was plugged and pounding but I was dizzy as all get out and achy all over. I hate being sick. I am glad it is rare for me, but let me just say - I can't wait to feel better. I was so sick that yesterday I slept practically all day. I would sleep, then get up to go to the bathroom, then I would go back to sleep (did I mention the copious amounts of Nyquil?) I felt somewhat better today, but not a ton. Grr. I just want to be healthy!!

Not the Long Awaited Post .... Sorry

The title of this post was a disclaimer because this is not the post that will explain what has been going on in my life for the last month that made me not post. No this post will just be my musings, that were sparked by watching a preview for this movie. It is called Penelope and it is about a girl who has a pig nose and will until she can find someone to accept her as she is until death do they part. So basically, as it was described to me by someone else, until she finds her 'true love'. I guess this got me to thinking about that term. True love.

Let's also bring up the movie 'Beauty and the Beast'. It is a great movie. I love it. One of my favourites by Disney. But the curse he is under states that he will be that way until he can learn to love another and earn her love in return (or something like that, I'm quoting off the top of my head here!) Anyway, when do you know that you have earned someone's love? That is really what this is driving at. I mean if you are cursed until you find your true love, is it just until you meet them, or until they love you, or until they tell you they love you. Because those three time points in time can be significantly different. I mean, all three could never happen, but some people never say the words "I love you" so if that was the case you would be totally screwed right?

In 'Beauty and the Beast' the curse breaks when she tells him, but maybe that is the same time she realizes she is in love with him (but I don't think it is the actual moment she 'falls in love with him'). Anyway, I was just wondering about that - because it would actually be quite convenient for you if it was when you met that person right, because the curse would end and that would tell you that you had just met your true love. If that is the case then put that curse on me because it is hard to know otherwise.

Also, I am obviously totally ignoring the fact that I totally disagree with the term 'true love' in general and that I think that it is stupid to think that you have one and only one person that you were meant to be with your whole life and that if you miss them then you are in big trouble. But if that was true, and curses could be put on people, then how is it determined that the curse is over. I guess that is all I am asking. Whatever. If anyone has insight let me know. Thanks!

Blogocrite!

So I am so bad. I have several blogs that I check most days of my friends and stuff and I get really annoyed when they haven't posted in a long time - but look at me! My last post was on the 1st of this month! I am so sad. So I decided that before I can complain about their lack of posting I had to put something on here. So, now I am officially complaining! Lol.

Anyway, there are two main things in my life that are way exciting right now. One is my brother's girlfriend is about ready to pop - her due date was technically the 11th of Jan and so now she is just waiting impatiently for the little dude to decide he is sick of the warm cushy womb. They are going to induce on Mon or Tues if there is nothing by then.

The other exciting thing is that my friends and I are going to Florida in like 4 days! (Not counting today or the day we are leaving of course!) I am so excited. There is still so much I want to do before then, but I suck and every time I plan to do it I get distracted by the phone or a book or the internet, or like tonight, a nap. I was so sleepy after work that I just laid on my bed to check my email and I totally fell asleep. It was way nice though. I love naps!

The last thing that I have to update on is that while getting ready for Florida Jas and I decided I needed to re-bleach my roots (I have to do that so much, it is way annoying!) and we decided I needed a haircut too. So I got an A-line and it looks way good. We looked off this picture of Victoria Beckham (Posh Spice for those who have no idea who that is from her real name) and I think it turned out really cute. I was going to take a pic and put in on here to show you but I took out my camera and the batteries were dead - so I guess you will have to wait until next time. I promise it won't be as long until my next post!

Resolution!

So, most often my New Years resolutions are like everyone else's - eat healthier, exercise more, blah blah blah! But no one (especially not me) ever stick to those resolutions for long, so I have decided to do something a little easier and a little more practical.

Floss more than I did last year. Which won't be hard because I suck at flossing my teeth. I hardly ever do. So I only have to do it like, 5 times to make it more than I did last year. And also, this resolution is good for my gum health. And easier than eating healthier or working out more. Blech! Wish me luck!

Being Afraid of the Dark

The title of this post is a little deceiving, since I think it might give you the impression that I am afraid of the dark, but I am not. In fact, I quite like the dark. I like sitting in the dark by myself - not sleeping or thinking really, but just being alone in the dark. I also like going on walks by myself at night in the dark. I know, I know, right now many or you are planning on clicking the little button at the bottom of this post and leaving me a cautionary comment about doing that - but you can stop. I know the danger and I have heard all the warnings, but I still love the dark.

The main reason for this post is that I have seen many movies recently, and in the past, that seem to encourage this sort of unprecedented fear of the dark. I saw the movie "30 Days of Night" and I liked it a lot. I liked for one that it didn't encourage the whole vampires are beautiful mentality that our culture is heading towards. In fact, after seeing the vampires in that movie, I don't think anyone would really WANT to become a vampire. But it still seems to be a cautionary tale of being in the dark ... at all ... ever. And another recent movie I saw was "I Am Legend" - which I thought was great. But still, the 'zombies' (for lack of a better word) only really seem to come out at night, and during the daylight hours they hang out in the dark.

All this leads me to wonder why, as humans, we are so afraid of the dark. I know that we can't see in the dark so that adds a little bit of unknown to many situations. But still, I don't think it is the dark we should be afraid of as much as what people (and other creatures) do in the dark. And mostly what they are willing to do because it is dark.

I guess being from a small town where everyone knows everyone and if you get in trouble your parents know before you get home made me feel safe in the dark. There were many times when my best friend, at the end of the night, would say, "'Oh, I have to walk her halfway home because she can't walk by herself in the dark." (As a side note here I will add that we lived maybe three blocks from each other.) But that was more so we could get more time together, and not really because either of us were afraid of the dark. But even now when I go home, and it is not too cold, I relish being able to go on a long walk in the dark by myself out to the stop-sign and back where there are almost no street lights and the view of the stars is amazing. So I maintain that it is healthy for me not to be afraid of the dark. I am still careful, especially when I am not at home in my town of 250 people but am instead in my current residential town of about 40,000, but that doesn't mean I don't do it. I am just smarter about it. In fact, I think I will go for a walk right now.

Flabby, Fat and Lazy

That is the way I get when I am at home. I don't do a whole lot of anything (I haven't even changed out of my PJ's today) and I eat a lot of junky food. It is so great. But crappy at times, because I get rumbly's in my tumbly and I feel like all I want to do is go for a run. Which, for me, is pretty crazy since I HATE running. And even though I slept way in this morning and it is only 10:30 I feel like it is about time to go to bed. So I will soon - right after this movie ends and if nothing else good is on TV afterwards (since my life is completely dictated by the schedule of the three TV channels we get here in Carmangay). Anyway, that is about all ... since I have been doing nothing, I really have nothing to write about. I hope I can be a bit more productive tomorrow. Maybe I will at least shower ... depending on what's on TV.

Excitorated!

That's right - excitorated. That is what I am. For I am leaving tomorrow for an entire week. I am so happy. Not that I don't love being here in Oregon and working my job and hanging out with my friends and all that - because I do - but I am way excited to get away from all of it and chillax for a week. Maybe figure out my life. Probably not, but I might actually have time to think for a few seconds. I have so much to do though, so very much. So little time. Blech. Anyway, that is the extent of my blogging power tonight because even though it is only 11:24 (early in the eyes of my roommate) I am dead tired! Work was tiring and so was life after work. It is time to rest up for my hectic day tomorrow. My next post will be from Canada! (fingers crossed)

Sorry

So today was one of those feel sorry for myself days. I don't know why, but I just felt 'blah'. Do you ever feel blah? Where it feels like you are too fat and too ugly and too mean and too nice and too stupid and too smart and no one will ever love you even though you know darn well that lots of people love you. I felt really alone even though I was surrounded by people. The thing was that I felt fine at work when I actually was by myself and then I got home and was around people and I felt like crap. And then this friend of mine - this sweet nice great friend of mine - called to see if I was okay. I hadn't told him I had to work today so he was wondering why I wasn't at church and wanted to know if I was okay. And that made it better in one way and worse in another. It was nice to know that right when I was feeling like no one cared, someone called and obviously did care. But at the same time, he is one of my friends and he is dating this girl, and that is the way it seems all my friends are (well not all, but many). And if they aren't dating someone then they at least have in the past ... but I haven't. And I feel weird about that. I feel like maybe I am going to meet this great guy someday who I really like and he will really like me until he finds that out and then he will assume that there is something wrong with me that he just didn't know about so he won't like me anymore. That is stupid and irrational, but there it is.

The title of this is really an apology to anyone who ends up stumbling across this horrid mushiness of my thought goo and actually reads it. Sorry that you read it. That is all. I won't feel like this tomorrow and I will post something normal. Maybe.

Hectic Week!

So, the concert was a great start to a crazy week. The day of the concert the friend I went with had her cell phone die and the charging post on the inside broke so it is now unusable. Then, my car on the way to the concert seemed like it was smoking or steaming, but since it was totally pouring we thought it was steam. The next day my roommate asked me to drive her to the airport and as we were going my car was still 'steaming' only, it was no longer raining. Uh oh right? So luckily when we were on the freeway it was okay because it stayed cool and didn't overheat, but just as we are about to get home there is a huge traffic backup on the freeway from an accident and we are stuck sitting there for a long time. We get back into town and the temp gauge is on the border between the red and the white, it even tips into the red slightly a few times. So I blast the heat and hurry home. As soon as I get there we pop the hood and green goop sprays everywhere and there is smoke rising from my poor engine.

To make a long story short, I finally got the stupid thing to the mechanic and he tells me that it is the water pump which made me lose all the water, so it overheated and then it blew the thermostat, the thermostat housing and it was so hot it even melted this gasket which made it so that air got into the fuel line and it wouldn't stay running. So, $668 later my car runs again. I am so broke. Poor me. But on the plus side, the car is running again. :)

Jingle Ball!

So my friend Jasmine and I went to this awesome concert where we saw:

Jordin Sparks

One Republic

Colbie Callait

and Avril Lavigne.
It was a way awesome concert - even though we stood on our feet for about 4 stinkin' hours! It was a long time! Anyway, my car overheated and freaked out on me afterwards so now I have to go deal with that, but I thought I would post some pics so you could all see the awesomeness! I bet you are jealous!

Good News!!!

So, today I finally got up the guts or the courage or the gumption or the ... whatever ... and I finished moving! Well, not totally finished, but it was actually not raining so I moved my bed, which was the reason I was holding back from moving the rest of my stuff. So tomorrow I will hopefully be moving the last of the things in my apartment! Yay. It is nice to know that I can sleep where most of my clothes and books and things are. It is way cool. Farewell apartment, we had some good times together. I will miss you. Sniffle.

I Wanna Be Like You

I really do. I want to walk like you, talk like you too.
It's true.
Because you are awesome, and although I may seem just as awesome (at times) I am really not. You think you know what I am like, but you don't. I am who I think you want me to be. I fill the roll I think you need filled in your life, but when I am alone I am void - I am nothing. I'm sorry if this makes you sad, but it is true. What do you want me to be today?
Oh how I wish I could quit my day-job and go jetting around the world and take as much time as I wanted for knitting and writing. But I can't. Sad.


(Some sleepy ramblings and an attempt at creative almost poetry)

Stalling ...

So I have been stalling on the finishing of the moving. The problem is that I am waiting for the weather to cooperate with the moving of my bed, and until I move my bed I don't want to move my TV or the rest of my food and dishes and stuff. So I am stalling. But it is hard to live halfway in two places - whatever I want always seems to be at the house I am not currently at.

As for other things, I had a really good talk with my co-worker during lunch today and it is great. The subject wasn't great, but it was great that he seemed to understand things I was talking about and didn't judge me for things I said that were a little ... hard to hear. He is a great guy who is very similar to me in a lot of important ways and that makes him a great person to work with. It was one of the best lunch breaks I have had in a long long time. Anyway, I guess it is bed time - tomorrow is going to be a crazy day -but that's all for now, folks!

Rejection

Well, a friend and I were talking about all the sinlge guys we know and I have come to a conclusion. I don't feel sorry for them. Well, a few of them ... maybe ... but seriously, if you aren't asking girls out and you know a lot of girls then it is your own darn fault. You can't expect to fall in love at first sight. It is okay to go out with someone a few times and then decide if you like them. And if you are worried about rejection then think about this boys ... you may get rejected when you ask out that girl and she says no, but I am getting rejected every time you ask out someone who is not me. Seriously. Every time a guy I like asks out a roommate or a friend or some girl I don't know, that is rejection. Even if my interest in him is only minimal, it is still a rejection. So now that you know I get rejected so often maybe you will feel less hurt when one or two girls say no to a date.

Phones = Awesome

I love phones. I know that many of my blog posts are about things I love, but I love lots of things and I want everyone to know all about it. So, to continue, I love phones. They are so super high tech now. It used to be that everyone just had home phones but now cell phones are so good you pretty much don't even need a home phone. Phones nowadays even have camcorders in them. I remember the first camcorder I ever saw belonged to my grandparents and it was huge. And now you can get them in cell phones. They even have video awards for people who film stuff on their phones (which I can't find a link to right now). And Chantal Kraviazuk even filmed the entire video for the song "Wonderful" on a Nokia N93. Crazy, I know. Maybe I can go into film-making with less cost than I thought!

Jon Schmidt

So first I have to say that I have not went to bed yet so technically it is still the 24th to me. So tonight I went to a Jon Schmidt concert and it was quite interesting. Not totally my type of music, but still good. He plays the piano amazingly! He made it look so effortless and easy. Made me jealous. Oh well. He was also quite a showman and very goofy which was fun. Some of his songs did sound quite similar to others though which kinda sucks, but there were a few I really liked. The funniest part about all of it was that he had played at BYU when I was there several times, and I never went, and now that I am not in BYU anymore, I went to see him. So funny.

Black Friday

So, I only left my house a few times since it is black Friday and I was afraid of the crowds. But I did enjoy some guitar hero party. Woo! Guitar Hero!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Well, it is finally Turkey Day! Nice. And even though I did have to work today it is a short day at the ole' office (although where I work really isn't an office, but you get it) so it isn't too bad. Also, I finally finished my hair last night. Yay! It is no longer orange, and we added a little bit of red for some kicks. Here's a pic.

Anyway, I am going to go and relax for a time before I stuff myself. I hope everyone has a good Thanksgiving (or if you are from Canada then have a good Thursday). Love ya!

Rick Mercer I Love You

I am from Canada but I have lived in the United States for the last five years going to school and working and whatnot. Everytime someone finds out I am from Canada they proceed to make Canada jokes (how did Canada get its name? hyuk hyuk) All I can think of in those times of frustration on my part was Rick Mercer. He is so awesome and has improved my life so much. Thank you Rick. Thank you very much.

Sadness ...

So I am moving to save money. I am moving in with my friend and I am going to be paying less than half of what I pay in rent now. I still still have all the amenities, but the bathroom is way smaller and so is the bedroom, but the closet is bigger and the money I am saving will be so worth it. I started packing today and already my apartment looks so sad and empty. I have taken the few things I had up off of the walls and packed up everything that was on all my bookcases and stuff. I even took most of my closet. I figure I will go and unpack as I am going so that when I move the bed in, which should be almost last, then I won't have tons of boxes everywhere. I hope it goes the way that I plan. I am going to miss my apartment so much though, I really do love it. Oh well, I can have a nice apartment again later in life. I guess. Or a nice house or whatever. I will keep you updated on how smoothly it goes with everything. :)

Longest Day Ever!

Okay, maybe not EVER, but it was a long day. I found out that my bosses dad died yesterday so I have to work on Thanksgiving. And then there was an emergency at like 2:45 and I ended up staying until almost 5 o'clock. Now I am tired. But, on the plus side, since I am working t-day I am going to have tomorrow and wed off, then fri through sun as well. Which is kinda nice since I am planning on moving soon and so I can take that time to start packing things up and moving some things over. Also, I think I found someone to take over my lease already! Yay! Well, I have to go shower since I am tired of smelling like monkey. Sigh.

Working Girl

I hate working the weekends. I like staying up late and playing with my friends (namely Guitar Hero, but sometimes other games like Rook) but then it makes getting up for work really really suck! Blech! I think it would be awesome to be an author, then I could sleep in every day and still earn enough money to live. I think I will work on that. Mind you, I decided to work on that at the beginning of Nov when I started NaNoWriMo and I haven't even written 1000 words yet (but I am just under). Unfortunately that is nowhere near the 50,000 I was aiming for. I still have a week right? I can still make it ..... or not, but I can get closer.

Also, I finished my knitting project and I have pics, but I forgot to ask Skyla if I could post pics of her daughter on here and I don't want to do it without her permission. Maybe I could do some editing of the head and then post them. We'll see.

Day Off

So, I get the day off today, which is way nice. This was the first time I got even close to enough sleep during the night. I still set my alarm though, because I really like waking up when my alarm goes off and then just turning it off and getting to go back to sleep! Muahahaha! It is great. But I think I have been almost on the verge of getting sick for the last few days and today since I let myself sleep in it was like the sickness kicked in and my throat was all scratchy and my head was half clogged. It was crazy. But I feel better now. I hope that will be the sickest I get.

So I totally have made the decision to move. My friend has a house and she will let me move in to a private bedroom for less than half of what I pay for my apartment now. I know I will be giving up my apartment, which I love (it is super cute) but I really need to save money. I have some bills that I am getting sick of owing and I want to start paying more on my student loan. So, the decision has been made, I listed my apartment on Craig's list, and I am going to move at the end of this month/the beginning of next month. Wish me luck!

I Have Failed Again!

Dang it! I failed at this whole blogging every day thing. I missed once, and now I have missed twice. I totally didn't even think about it last night until about 12:30 when I was half asleep. Stink! It is because life is so crazy. I finally finished the baby dress/jumper thing I was making, but I didn't get a chance to take a pic before giving it to my co-worker for whom I was making it (well her daughter) because she wanted it for pics and a trip she is going on. Anyway, she got some really cute pics of her daughter in it though so she is going to give me some and then I will post them.

Anyway, so I finished that on Tues night at like 2 am, then I worked Wed. Work took a long time on Wed and so I was supposed to stay late, but I had to get my hair recolored (it was a bit orange) so I got that done, then I went to Fry's with some friends, not realizing how long we would be there. Then we left and were starving so we went to get food. I didn't get home 'til midnight (and I didn't go back to work) so I tried to get up and go in early this morning, but it wasn't as early as I had planned and it took longer to do what I had to. Anyway, we eventually did everything we had to, but it still took forever. Then I was supposed to go to someone's place after work and I totally got lost! I am glad I have tomorrow off so I can catch up on my sleep.

Also, I think I am going to move soon. I will keep you updated on that. But now I am going to go and veg out and not think.

Blonde! Oh how I love being a blonde! Well ... at least I am getting used to being a blonde. I took a few pics last night. It is weird how having a different hair color, even though I don't see it that often, has made me act differently. I think that I am more outgoing and stuff because ... I guess I think that people won't recognize me or something. Whatever. Anyway, I like this pic better.

Oh and sad story, right after I took these photos I went to take out my earrings and I dropped one. And they are the glass. And it broke. So sad :( They were like my favourite pair. I guess I am going to have to go to Saturday's market and pick up some more. I hope I can find some awesome ones.

Psychic Radio

So, the craziest thing happened today. After bleaching my hair on Friday a friend and I at work were talking about how Gwen Stefani must have people to bleach her hair every day! Then we started talking about Gwen and how my friend used to think she was freaky looking, but then as she gets more and more famous he keeps finding her more and more attractive. As he was in the middle of saying "I didn't like her back during her more Ska days..." and right at that moment "Just a Girl" started playing on the radio. Freaky? We both sat there for like 2 minutes after that going "What the crap! How did that just happen?" It was so weird. It was like the radio knew what we were talking about. Wow! Insane.

Stuff

So I am not really up for a big post today ... so I am just going to put a short one up. I am kinda tired. I got up and went to work this morning after staying up late last night (story of my life!) and so now I am kinda tired even though it is not that late.Well, it is later than I was planning on it being I guess, but it isn't as late as it feels. So this girl at work has been gone for a while - she was on a trip, then her daughter was sick, and now she is sick so she probably won't be in tomorrow. That means that tomorrow is going to feel a lot like a weekend day for lab presence, even though it is Monday. Anyway, I have rambled on enough I guess, so I am going to knit a few more rows and then hit the hay. Hopefully I won't be too tired at work tomorrow.

Lateness!

Well, today has been a full day. I have been knitting like a maniac trying to get a project finished in time for a friend, and at the same time I re-bleached my hair again today trying to get some of the orangeness out of it. Also, I ran a few errands and played Rook for a long time (too long) at my friend's house. Now it is late and I have to work in the morning and I am really tired, but I thought I would post a quick post. The one I posted yesterday has the wrong time on it so it says it was posted early this morning, and this one will have the same thing. I should look in to how to fix that. Hmmm. Anyway, g'night.

Mandi is Blonde!

What? That's right, you heard me, blonde! Well, I was trying to figure out something different to do with my hair, and I thought, what is more different than blonde? Not a whole lot. So I cut it and I dyed it. First, the before photo ...

That is pretty obvoius, that is what I looked like before. This is the during pic ...

Haha, we bleached it first, then we cut it, then we added a toner. It is still a little oranger than I would like, but I am not sure I can handle any more bleach tonight, so we are going to wait a few days to get the rest of the orange out. The funny thing is that there is a definite difference where my hair was dyed from before and where my roots had grown in my natural color. My roots are very bleached, and the rest is the semi-orange color. Stupid store bought dye!

Anyway, here is the finished picture...

The photo isn't my favourite, but you get the picture. It is a lot different! But I will get use to it eventually ... right? We will see. And we will also see if blonde's really do have more fun!

Today's Post

Well, today has been a weird. I totally forgot that I was working on Sunday, so I get tomorrow off. And of all people to remind me, it was my boss, who never remembers stuff like that. Crazy! But now I get a surprise day off, which is kinda cool. I have to make up for it by working Sunday, but that is okay every once in a while.

So today I was talking to my co-worker again (man he makes a lot of appearances in this here blog) and I was telling him things about myself (the way people tend to do when they are talking) and I said something that I had never really said out loud before, but that was really true, and really kinda sad. His reaction was that it was a 'strong statement'. And it was. But I can't feel bad about it, since I had never really thought about it before and I don't know any different so I am not sure I would like a different reality better.

I think that this might make more sense if I was willing to say on here what I said to him in Shari's, but I think that might be a little too revealing, but I hope that you are getting what I am trying to say. I think that it is sad how we always think the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, but how do we know? What makes me think that if things had gone differently in my life I would be happier? I am actually quite happy. Maybe my life hasn't been ideal, but whose has? No one's. Everyone has unfortunate things that have happened in their lives. Everyone!

If my life had gone differently than it did than I would be a totally different person than I am today - but I happen to like the person that I am today. I sometimes wish I was braver or smarter or prettier (always prettier) but I am who I am and I can live with that. And if you can't then you can suck it! I am sorry if this is a repetitive post (I am not sure if I have written this before but I very well might have). Thanks.

Karma ... Oh How I Hate It!

Not that I hate actual karma, I just kinda hate the idea of karma. Let me explain. A co-worker and I were talking (man he is a good source of things to blog about!) and we came to the conclusion that karma is just a way for many people to feel good about themselves and to not feel compassion when something bad happens to other people. One of the only times I hear about karma at all is when something bad happens to someone who someone else doesn't like and they go "Karma's a bitch!" But seriously, how does anyone really deserve something bad to happen to them? They don't! I mean, whatever happened to 'two wrongs don't make a right'? As people we just use karma to justify being happy when something bad happens to someone else so we can say that they deserved it.

And when it really comes down to it you have to ask if karma really makes sense anyway? Sure, if you do something bad then you have bad stuff happen to you, and if you do good, good things will happen, right? So, does that mean that babies who have Down Syndrome or something like that really DESERVE it because of something they may have done in a past life that they have no idea of and can take no physical accountability for. Or what about children being disabled or something because their parents 'deserve it'? That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard! Seriously, sometimes bad thing just happen to good people, and sometimes good things happen to bad people, and sometimes bad things happen to bad people ... you get the point. That is just how things work, it is not necessarily because they deserve it or earned it in any way, it just is. Accept it. Sucker.

6Things of Me

The rules of the game should be posted at the beginning of the post. Each player lists 6 facts/habits about themselves. At the end of the post, the player then tags 6 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they have been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

1. I dislike silence. I would love to have the radio playing or the TV on or some sort of background noise whereever I go than have to be in silence. Not that I hate silence, that is not exactly right, I just like noise. I think it stems from me thinking my house was haunted when I was little and always having the music on so I couldn't hear the strange sounds from elsewhere in the house. Or maybe I just love music. Whatever the case, I feel better when there is background noise.

2. I don't like to make decisions. Most of you who know me know that this is a very true statement. It is not that I can't make a decision, but it is just that if I don't have an opinion about where we eat dinner and someone else does than why should I deprive them for no good reason. The problem is there are a lot of things I don't have an opinion on and other people get a little annoyed. Oh well, c'est la vie.

3. I love knitting! That might be obvious from other posts on this same blog, but it is true. And maybe I am just an old lady at heart, but I don't care, I love it anyway. I took a sewing class in high school and I loved that too. I think I just like making things.

4. I love writing. I think secretly I have always wanted to be a writer, but I am afraid that if I try to do it as a career then I will start to hate it because I HAVE to do it.

5. I have low self esteem. This sounds kinda cliche I think, but it is true. I think I am okay at things, like knitting and writing, but I know I am not the best (I am not even close to the best really). I would rather not try very hard at something (like writing) than try my hardest and fail and prove to myself that I suck. I figure that if I don't try very hard and I fail then it wasn't my best anyway, so it isn't actual failure. I hate this about myself, but I can't stop it.

6. I don't have emotions. Well, obviously that one isn't true but I don't get worked up about stuff almost at all. I am very even tempered and logical - to the point that I seem to not have emotions. At my last job this was the running joke because in 2 and half years working there I never got emotional. That can be a good thing, because who wants a bunch of emotional nut jobs running around at their job? But still, I didn't get homesick even though I was about 900 miles from home, I didn't get all emotional about dating or my friends. Even when I was leaving that same job I didn't get emotional because it was just another step in life, not something to cry about. I can't decide if this is a good thing or not.

Now a note about the preceding. This list took me a bit to come up with because I didn't want it to be all stupid things or obvious things like "I have blue eyes," but I didn't want to pretend that I was being all profound or that I was deep or anything (which would be a lie after number 6 eh?) Also, it says to 'tag' 6 other bloggers but I really don't know that many people who blog (sad isn't it?) and the ones that I do know who blog I wouldn't want to tag. I did this more for my benefit (and the benefit for my two readers) than for the whole pass it on thing. Sorry, but that is just how I work. I won't forward on your emails either, no matter how many years of bad luck in love I will get for it (thinking back though ... that does explain a few things!)

Until tomorrow then!

A Little Mad .... A Little Relieved

So I never posted yesterday, but not because I didn't want to, but because my internet hates me. Well, that is not entirely true, the problem is that it was not my internet, it was just whatever I could get from a neighbor - which all day yesterday was nada! So I gave in today and signed up for my own darn internet! So I am mad I couldn't post yesterday but I am relieved that I will never have to fight with the internet again since I am paying for it so it better work well all the dang time! So I missed one post ... it is the thought that counts right?

Also, I am a little mad that I got my mail back. I tried to send the thing I had knitted for my little (future) nephew the other day and I got it back in the mail today due to not enough postage. I even went to the post office and had them weight it and stuff - but just as I was arriving the girl behind the counter was having a discussion with some random guy about her relationship with her boyfriend and why it was going to end because people knew about it at work and so I think she was a little distraught and not paying attention to what she was doing. So, I maintain that it was her fault, and not my own, that this didn't get to it's intended target. So I am going to try again ... maybe tomorrow during my lunch break. We will see.

Anyway, until my next post (tomorrow) which will be a little questionnaire that Chelsea sent to me, I bid you adieu.

That's Why I Love People ...

... they think of everything!

This is what a guy I work with said to me yesterday. He had just got a new motorcycle helmet and tail bag and we were discussing how useful they were (and how awesome the helmet was) and how nice it is that someone thought of even including a rainproof part (like a fly for a tent) to go over the tail bag for when it rains (which is a lot because we are in Oregon). And it is really nice that someone thought of that so he didn't have to suffer and ruin his laptop or something the first time it rained when he was riding. And there are lots of things that I would never have thought of until too late, and so I am always glad someone else thought of it (even if they had to learn the hard way - which sucks for them, but is great for public in general). So yeah, that is why I love people - they really do think of everything!

3D movies ...

.... and other things that I can't believe haven't caught on more in life.

I love 3D movies. They have had 3D movies at places like Disneyland and Disneyworld for a long long time. I am not sure exactly how long, but for a while I think. So why hasn't this caught on more in the mainstream? I mean, even now you have to go to a special showing of a special movie that is only playing in certain theatres before you can see a movie in 3D - but it is so cool! I want to see every movie in 3D. It would make things more realistic and maybe people wouldn't be so desensitized to violence and stuff if it was all in 3 dimensions and popping off the page every time you go to the theatre. Not to mention, the idea of going to the movies is losing steam - people are doing it less and less because you can just wait a few months and get it on DVD to watch in your house. Well, if I knew that the movie in the theatre was going to be different from the one that I just saw in my home than I would make more of an effort to go to the actual theatre!

Another thing that I am surprised hasn't caught on more in life is radio controllers for your car right on your steering wheel. I know that you can get that as a feature in certain vehicles, but for how awesome it is it is still surprisingly rare. For one thing, not having to lean over to mess with the controls every time that song you like comes on and you have to turn it up, or that song you hate comes on and you have to change the channel would be great. So much safer. And I am lazy so the lack of effort needed is nice too.

So those are two things that I think are great and should become more mainstream. And that's all that I have to say about that ... for now.

Happy November!

So my friend got me to join NaBloPoMo (National Blog Posting Month) and you just go to this website and join and then you are supposed to post a blog everyday. We will see how I do. This was my first blog that I posted on the site:

First blog of the month on this website. I actually blog all the time (well, sometimes) on another site so I guess this is not technically my first time (although my first time was great!) Anyway, I just wanted to put a quick post about how much I love the internet. I live on the west coast and I can talk to my friends in the middle and on the east coast and in other countries while looking up stupid videos of things people in China did while also learning about the local news in my parents hometown all while sitting on my butt at work. And the greatest thing, I can do it anywhere! Most shops or stores you go into nowadays will offer free WiFi which is just stellar. I know you all probably already agree with this post because many of you are bloggers yourselves (or like reading blogs - either way you know the joys of the internet) but I felt the necessity to share my love and devotion for this amazing thing. I would marry the internet if I could, but I don't think that it would stay monogamous to me and then I would get all jealous and we'd have a nasty divorce and then our children's lives would be ruined - so maybe it is better that I can't. But I still love it and will have a love affair with it anytime I want, and you should all feel free to do the same!

Knitting Projects

So I knitted a few things lately. This first one is a scarf I knitted and then felted for the first time, which was super cool. I love felting! Then the second one is a little baby sweater that I knitted for my future nephew and it turned out super cute. So awesome! I love knitting!

Bad Blogger!

Okay, so I know I am a really bad blogger, but having very unpredictable internet (and being lazy) makes for inconsistent blogging I guess. Also, I have a very boring life so I have not too much to blog about - although I thought of a good topic the other day and now I can't remember it. So instead I will write about knitting. YAY! So anyway, I knitted a cute toque for my friends birthday and I forgot to take a picture :( But I am also working on a scarf which is going to be felted and that is cool and I am trying to find a cool pattern for something to keep myself warm in the cool Oregon weather and a different pattern for my future little nephew for the baby shower.



Also, last weekend I went camping (okay, two weekends ago) out on the Oregon coast and had a ton of fun. We also went to check out the aquarium and this cool thing that OSU has where you can check out the ocean life (I got to touch an octopus!) and we went to the lighthouse. It was so cool! Although, it was really high (as you can tell by the picture of all the stairs we had to climb) but the view was totally worth it! The coast is so pretty. Anyway, I have nothing else to blog about so I am going to go for now. I am so boring. Maybe I will start working on more knitting projects so I have things to post about later.

As for this last pic, I took it from the top of the lighthouse and I thought it was really cool looking. It is of the part that helps reflect the light out onto the ocean. I rule at photography! LOL!

My New Hair

So, I was a little bored last weekend and I thought I would dye my hair. I had a dream that I did it blond and it was freaky so I decided to go darker. The only thing is that it went way darker than I thought it would.

Then I got bored again and decided to take some pictures with dark eyeliner and lipstick on and viola! Scary pics of Mandi. Anyway, I thought I would post some pics of my new hair since I realized that I haven't added new pics of myself to anything in a long time. Anyway, enjoy!